Do Us a Favor, Leave Your Children at Home

These days I find myself becoming increasingly frustrated by the number of out of control, obnoxiously rude children I must encounter on a daily basis. They are at my work, in the grocery store, and most restaurants. So, why do so many have children if they apparently don't want to raise, or at the least, watch after them in public?

Our town's local chain clothing store has quickly become the new trendy daycare/playground. The best part is that the parents don't even have to pay others to watch their children, in fact, they actually get to shop while others gawk at their child's unbelievable behavior. I am sure many of the awestruck onlookers are thinking something similar to what I find myself thinking. My mother would have smacked me if I would have even tried pulling something like that. But apparently things have changed since I was a child only 10 years ago.

I can't imagine the punishment I would have endured if I had grabbed a soccerball at a store and started to kick it around with my siblings. If I had even grabbed the ball and set it down on the floor, I wouldn't even have the time to wind up to kick it before my mother would have had me by the arm, speaking sternly in my ear, all while dragging me out of the store. However, it is a common sight for me. I see them kicking the ball around, sometimes their parents are actually the ones they are kicking it around with, and apparently this is all acceptable. Nevermind the fact that others are trying to shop without having to worry about tripping over a stray soccerball. Nevermind that the kicking of the ball leads to the running after of the ball thus throwing all caution and awareness of others out the window. I have been ran into, hit in the leg with numerous soccerballs, and even cringed as one was kicked so hard that it went flying high into the air just barely missing the overhead lights. Do these parents find this behavior acceptable? Or even worse, have they forgotten that they are no longer children and are in fact parents?

Then when I go to the grocery store I often find evidence of how these children come to run the show, it starts at a very early age.

While shopping the young child gets aggravated over their parents refusal to buy the new overpriced, cause your teeth to fall out of your head, famous cartoon character endorsed treat. As the parent proceeds to shop, or at least try to through their child's whining, the child takes note of the parents growing unease and turns up the volume. Finally the parent, tired of listening to their child and apparently unaware of their ability to tell the child that they need to behave or face punishment will grab a ziplock of gummy bears conveniently prepackaged in their purse or diaper bag and offer their child some in exchange for silence. And what do those gummy bears do? They reinforce the bad behavior as the child learns that by whining when they don't get their way they will be offered a favorable alternative to their original alternative. In simpler terms, they are rewarded for whining.

I know that as a young woman who hasn't had children yet many may think that this all just my personal theory, but what I do know for sure if my mother never would have offered my gummy bears for throwing a temper tantrum. She never would have offered to kick a ball around a store with me. I knew that even though I was friends with my mother, I was also her daughter, and therefore subject to her rules. And my mother's rules where designed to teach me to be considerate of others and to respect authority. It went deeper than that, I wasn't even offered the chance to own things that may tempt me to be inappropriate, and this brings me to one of my biggest pet peeves: wheelies.

You may have noticed the new trend of sneakers that double as skates. These shoes offer children, or adults (though I hope many choose to resist the urge), the chance to skate in seconds with a simple pop of the heal. My issue isn't so much with the shoes/skates themselves, it is rather with the parents who purchase these for their children no rules attached. I tend to think that if you wouldn't allow your child to wear their rollerskates to your local grocery or department store, then why in the hell would you allow them to skate around in their shoes in these places? I tend to find that when the kids to decide to utilize the sneakers hidden wheels they forget all those around them and so I have been nearly run over by kids in skating shoes many times, and of course whenever this has occurred there were no parents in sight. In fact, when I think about it, most times when there are children at play in areas designated as no play zones there are no parents in sight. Which is why I feel that many stores and public places are considered to be free daycares by parents all too willing to allow complete strangers to look after their unruly children who are only that way because their parents never enforced the rules. Sure there are those exceptions who are uncontrollable because of medical conditions or traumas that occurred outside the home, but for the most part, if the children aren't behaving it is safe to say that it is because the first people they knew of this world, their parents, didn't properly introduce them to it.

The uncontrollable children of the world don't just render me frustrated, they also leave me feeling a bit sad. I cherished the relationship that I had with my mother. Although when I was younger I thought most of the rules were dumb and I did my fair share of breaking them, as I grew older I learned to appreciate the limits that were set for me. I like the fact that I can go over to someone's house and be invited back. I find relief in knowing that I have table manners when going out to dinner with my boyfriend's family. You see, setting boundaries isn't just about respecting others, it is also about feeling confident in your ability to make a good impression later in life. Let's face it, society has norms and while these norms do have a little leg room, they aren't to be ignored altogether. Chewing like a horse, slurping noodles, talking in a shout, interrupting others, and going through life with complete disregard for others just doesn't cut it. There are careers to get, spouses to meet, and then children to raise. If children aren't raised then how will they raise their own? The never ending cycle needs to end. So, if you don't want to deal with being a parent, then maybe you don't want kids as much as you thought?