Do Women Believe Nice Guys Are Boring?

The poor nice guy, always seeming to finish last in the race for the ladies. But is that really true? With some types of women it is very true. With other women their smart enough to know what's really important, and which guy goes the distance.

Women who believe nice guys are boring, don't seem to understand you don't have to be the worst guy on the block to be adventurous or exciting. For some reason in their mind nice always means boring. Perhaps the movies, television, and media haven't helped with this one. I mean really, how many movies or sitcoms have you seen that always portray the nice guy not only as a little bit boring, but downright nerdy? So, is the problem with women believing this from the get-go, or have they been brainwashed over and over again to see nice guys in the way in which they have been portrayed? We may never really know, it's just like the thought provoking cliché, which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Could part of the problem be that because a women goes in with the belief that a nice guy might be boring, that's how she she's him, regardless of the exciting date she may be having with him? This is a definite possibility. Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on the circumstances, what we choose to believe does shape how we perceive things, whether that perception is really correct or not. Don't get me wrong the perception in and of itself is valid, at least in the sense that it is ours, and we chose that particular perception by what we chose to believe. Okay, now you're probably really confused. It's really simple, what we end up seeing or perceiving is based on what we decided to believe about it in the first place. This unfortunately sets up a distorted filter about what is really there. Therefore if a woman goes on a date with "A Nice Guy" and she thinks, wow, he is going to be boring, he will be boring, even if he's really not. Poor nice guy, life isn't always fair!

I remember seeing in a few movies where a friend might be setting up a blind date for another friend, and the woman cringing when her friend says, yeah, but he's a nice guy! Yes, this seems to be true as well for men, except for the men it usually means a woman is not that good looking when a friend says she's really nice. Either way the movies, and television has really effected how we look at things, especially in relationships.

Yes, by the time we have been influenced by family, friends, movies, television, the media, and good old society, we have developed some of the most distorted views of men, women and relationships; it makes you wonder how we could ever possibly have a thought of our own. Sometimes I ponder if we are any better off then Pavlov's dogs were!

Last but not least, putting the influence of society aside, a woman may have had a bad experience or two with a nice guy, and then in her infinite wisdom (not), decided that all nice guys are boring and she might as well find a group for women addicted to bad boys. She fails to recognize that everyone is an individual and those bad experiences had to do with the specific individuals they were, and not because they were nice guys. Unfortunately, a lot of people do this, men as well as women. If a man has a bad experience with a blonde, all of a sudden he's telling everyone who will listen how bad blondes are, and how one should never date them. Yes, a lot of people do this; we tend to associate a bad experience or trait of an individual to a specific group of people, without a thought that it's really quite ridiculous to think that way. Well, I can't say people will be changing this any time soon, so, my advice is, treat each person as an individual, and never equate a bad experience, or one person's bad traits, with any one group of people. You never know, that nice guy just may be your adventurous Mr. Right!