Does Santa Wear a Thong?

You may not believe this, but it is very disheartening to have paradise all year round. I live in South Texas and that is what it is, paradise all year-round. Right now it is mid-November and it is 85 degrees. The days are sunny and perfect and the beach is only minutes away. Only an enlightened few are down here enjoying the perfect weather by walking and playing on the beach. These "Winter Texans" are those who have made it a habit to escape the sludge and mess of cold weather up there and come down here to enjoy the weather that averages in the 80s and dips down to the 50's in January for a few weeks. We call them crazy "gringos" because they are the only ones getting into the hotel pools in January, and not like a "polar bear dip". They actually swim and frolic in the water.
We, look at them crazily, from below layers and layers of flannel and sweaters because once it dips below 65 degrees, everyone down here bundles up and makes soup to signal the coming of "winter.

I have only seen snow once in my life and that was from a freak cold snap that caused snow flurries down here about three years ago. It was awesome! Can you believe it was snowing right on the Texas/Mexico's southernmost border in Brownsville, TX? I discovered that snow actually does crunch like in the poems that I have read about and even taught in English class. Sadly, in a few hours I also saw that it was true that the snow can become a sloppy, muddy mess. The beauty, though, was incredible. From looking at the strange covering on the ground, to watching the flakes fall from the sky, to tramping along in boots in the freshly fallen snow, it was an unbelievable event in South Texas. Everyone was out that night with camcorders, cameras and cell phones amazed at this never-before-seen substance. The few people that slept that night woke up to snowmen that had sprung up everywhere overnight. There were children everywhere outside stomping in and forming balls of snow. Some of those children were thirty to forty-something years old. Many of us had never seen snow before in our lives so we were actively throwing snowballs at anyone unlucky enough to come into our range. There is a certain look of excitement on kids' faces when they are playing, kind of like a puppy dog who is so frisky he can't hide it on his face. It is a stupid, open-mouthed, wide-eyed look like on a kid that has just won a prize in something. That was the look that everyone had down here when it snowed, young and old.

It only snowed for one night, which is a good thing because most of us down here only own three sweaters. One for each of the three cold days in January we call winter. Many palm trees in yards are done up in lights in people's yards and that is a beautiful tropical Christmas sight. We do have a Christmas Parade in Brownsville, TX. but we are right on the Texas/Mexico border so it is usually a balmy, beautiful evening with most people in short-sleeved shirts and shorts. The kids play outside on Thanksgiving and Christmas here but not in the fallen snow, as they do up north, but on the green grass and the 28 fallen leaves that fell in the "fall". The leaves do not change colors here, everything is a solid green year round. Palm trees dominate the landscape and are silouhetted against the sunsets every night. People do manage to get truckloads of Christmas trees down here to sell, but aside from the decorations, it does not feel like a typical Christmas down here. I remember being in shorts and playing frisbee in the front yard with the frisbee Santa brought me one year. I pictured Santa in a palm-leaf patterned shirt leaving from our house and the reindeer wearing visors and brightly colored sunglasses. Yes, even on Christmas Eve, because being a flying deer is cool no matter where in the world you are.

So here I am in 80 degree weather planning what to make for Thanksgiving dinner. Hot turkey with hot mashed potatoes and gravy and hot stuffing on a hot day seems strange doesn't it? Try wearing shorts on Christmas Day. Most people dream of a white Christmas, I plan on a walk down the beach on South Padre Island.