Domestic Violence Among High School, College Students is Alarming

The number of high school and college students - both males and females - involved in violent or abusive relationships is alarming says Dr. Sandra Stith, director of the marriage and family therapy program at Kansas State University. An increasing number of teens and young adults are victims of domestic violence involving everything from sexual abuse and rape to pushing, slapping and punching to stalking and emotional abuse.

In a Sept. 12 press release, Stith, a nationally recognized domestic violence expert and a pioneer in couples treatment for domestic violence, says that about "30 percent of college students have been in relationships that involve physical aggression. Even more have been in relationships that are emotionally abusive." High school students in abusive relationships number about one in four, or 25 percent, she says.

According to the statistics of the Alabama Coalition Against Domestic Violence (ACADV), the college and high school domestic violence numbers are similarly alarming. The ACADV says one in five college females will experience some form of violence while in a dating relationship; about one in three high school students have been or will be involved in an abusive relationship. Further, a survey of teens and college students found that date rape accounted for 67 percent of sexual assaults.

Stith and others are clear in their assertion that there is no cut and dried answer as to why violence within young relationships is occurring at its current rate. Stith says the triggers are many and complex. Nonetheless, she identifies stress, the inability to control one's anger and highly intense relationships as common triggers.

She also said that many students in abusive relationships really believe they don't deserve anything better. Or they believe that controlling and abusive language and physical aggression are acceptable in their dealings with other people. But Stith said society needs to "send a clear message that abuse in any form is not normal, not acceptable and not OK."

Although studies have shown that both males and females are victims of domestic violence, whether that be emotionally or physically, Stith cautions that "we cannot minimize violence against women. Male violence is more likely to cause serious injury and death."

The ACADV says domestic violence among teenagers and young adults in dating relationships sometimes occurs when there's pressure or influence from peers to act violently. Also, some have a distorted view of romantic love, believing jealousy and controlling behavior "proves" one's love or that one is loved.

There are also distorted beliefs peculiar to the sexes. Males often believe they have the right to "control" their female partners in any way necessary. Some believe physical aggressiveness is a sign of masculinity and that they have the right to demand intimacy. In some circles, males believe they'll lose the respect of both their peers and their girlfriend if they are attentive or supportive of her.

Females tend to believe that they're the one responsible for solving problems in the relationship. Some believe that aggressiveness and abuse are normal because their friends are in similar situations. And many females believe their boyfriend's jealousy or possessiveness proves his love or is romantic.

Stith says a healthy relationship should make a person feel proud of themselves. She suggested that people in relationships ask themselves: "Do I feel better or worse about myself when I am in this relationship?" If the relationship doesn't make the person feel they are "a beautiful person," they need to get out. "Admittedly, it is hard to get out of a relationship alone ... and students shouldn't have to," she said. "Studies indicate that many victims want help but don't know where to turn."

Having recognized that "abuse and violence in dating relationships occurs at alarmingly high rates," New York's Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence (NY OPDV) model for school policies says that schools "should create a domestic violence response team made up of school personnel with specialized training in conducting in-depth assessments, safety planning, making appropriate community referrals, and facilitating linkages with appropriate services. Alternatively, a school could train existing student support services, family wellness centers, and/or child abuse or crisis teams to fulfill these functions."

Stith says that virtually all schools and campuses now offer some form of counseling and support services for those involved in violent or abusive relationships.

Sources:

Press release, Domestic Violence Expert Looks at Dating Violence Among High School, College Students; http://www.newswise.com/articles/view/533341/

ACADV; http://www.acadv.org/dating.html#statistics

NY OPDV, Education System Model Domestic Violence Policy for Counties; http://www.opdv.state.ny.us/coordination/model_policy/educate.html