Done with the Bar Scene?

Are you contemplating why you squander your weekend nights on the couch in front of the TV? Or why you sit alone at the bar looking for a fly by night fling? Do you have trouble finding someone of the opposite sex to spend quality time with? Are you ready to get your life together and do what it takes to find Mister or Miss Right?

There are several places you should avoid when looking for a date. There are also some places you may have not thought about where looking for a date is a good idea. You should also limit the people you take dating advice from. Start your quest in the search for a quality date.

Where the hot dates are not

For starters, looking for a date in a bar is a big mistake. After a few drinks your judgment nose dives toward the South Pole! Someone you would probably never look twice at suddenly becomes America's Next Top Model. You are likely to find this person attractive only until you open your eyes the next morning. When you discover those perfect teeth from the night before soaking in a cup in the bathroom, the toothy smile on your own face quickly disappears in the harsh morning after reality.

Attitude & Appearance

Attitude is very important when searching for the perfect mate. Even if you are not one of America's top ten sexiest people, the right attitude boosts your appearance. It is human traits to be attracted to people that are pretty or handsome. Since beauty is only skin deep, having a confident attitude can enhance your physical appearance.

It certainly doesn't hurt to take pride in being clean either. Shower and put on some spiffy duds. You could wear those old baggy lounge pants that you sleep in, but it is a good idea to wait until after the "I do's" before sporting that kind of look. Dress nice, hold your head high, and be confident. Others will notice, especially others of the opposite sex. After all, that is whose attention you are trying to get.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself! Take control of your dating experiences! It is time to create your own destiny, and start looking for dates in the right places.

Where to look for hot dates (Three places: Library, Coffee Shop, Transportation)

So, where should you look for a date? Where are all the single, available, and attractive folks hiding? These are the timeless questions that all your friends have the answers to. Hold on a second; when you think about it, the friends answering these questions for you just so happen to be single.

Ignore your single friends

Here's a hint. A really great piece of advice is to never take counsel about dating from a single friend. Chances are they themselves are still single for a reason. They probably have no idea what they are talking about, or they wouldn't be single. Don't be fooled by a friend who says, "I'm just playing the field." Or a friend who claims, "I'm not ready to settle down yet." These are typical statements from people that want you to be as single and miserable as they are.

Dewey Decimal System of dating

The library is a good place to meet someone if appreciate good books. At the library it is quiet and it you have a chance to browse around and "accidentally" bump into someone that may interest you. You want to try to stay near books you have a little knowledge of since you can always strike up a conversation about a book.

Some people are impressed by those little corny pick up lines. You can incorporate you reading surroundings with such lines as, what shelf have you been hiding on?...or I have been waiting on this shelf forever just waiting for you to come check me out. The possibilities are endless, Can I buy you a cup of coffee before you add me to your discard pile?...don't judge a book by its cover... and My meeting you was way overdue are just a few to get you started. Be unique. Ice breakers get you started into conversation. You may find the next time you curl up with a good book, you will have someone to share it with.

How about a cup of Joe

Coffee shops are another good place to meet someone that you might like to take out on the town. Coffee shops are not as quiet as libraries, and you can listen to what people are saying. If you are interested in talking to someone, don't let an opportunity pass you by. Don't be shy. The worst that can happen is someone simply isn't interested. Since you probably will never have to see the person again, this should be no big deal. Don't get discouraged. Keep asking. The right person will come along sooner than you might think.

Internet cafes are popping up all over the world. Why not try pick up a date while checking you e-mail. Show off your computer skills. If you have no computer skills, then you could find someone to help you. A perfect way to start a conversation would be asking for help with your laptop. With millions of questions about computers, you should have no problem posing a question to a person of interest.

On the Go

Bus stops are also good places to meet interesting people. If you have never tried riding a bus, give it a chance. You will be surprised how many different people ride busses every day. Maybe your future spouse is on the bus right now waiting for you to come along and sweep them off their feet.

If you live in a city with subways, you may find a person of interest to begin a conversation with. Even on short rides, just saying "Hi" or smiling could be enough to begin a relationship. It may be that you see the same person on a daily basis and that smile or kind word will be enough to eventually lead to conversation. Don't be shy. If you are interested speak up and let the other person know. You will never know if you don't try.

Trains are also good places to meet people. You can comment on the scenery, or where the person might be going. Either of these are good ice breakers. Once you get that first word in you will be surprised how easily things will flow from there.

These are a few examples of how you can spice up your weekends and possibly add the excitement of going out on a date that could potentially become a meaningful relationship. After talking and getting to know a person, you will wonder what you ever saw in the bar scene or reruns of Sex in the City?