Don't Want to Get a Divorce? - You're Not the Only One Who is Saying No to the Big D

Many people are saying no to divorce despite statistics. Why are these couples saying no to divorce? They are finding the solution to their problems. Solutions that you can use to mend your marriage or to make sure that yours doesn't end up as another marital statistics like famous celebrities who seem to be getting divorces left and right.

If you married for any other reason other than love then you probably shouldn't be reading this since I also cover a lot of love tips in this article. I didn't write this article to simply give you ideas to mend your marriage or keep you from getting a divorce, I wrote this so that you could use it as a guide to making your marriage work and keeping your marriage away from divorce. I hope you enjoy this and take the time to read through my other articles on marriage to see what else you can do to make your marriage work and have a long lasting relationship with your spouse.

There are a lot of things that I like to discuss with people who are having marital problems but view divorce as an option that will not happen. I like to talk about communication in your marriage, love, dating your spouse, discussing issues, working it out, and many other things. Let's go ahead and take a look at some of the things that can help you to steer away from divorce.

Communication

I have said this time and time again, communication is key to almost everything in life. If you aren't communicating on a solid level then you need to start. Communication doesn't just mean to allow the other person to talk, you need to listen and understand their point of view. If you can't communicate with your spouse and I mean on everything including finances and children then you might as well forget about your marriage.

Love

I remember the first time that I told my husband that I loved him and chances are that you and your spouse remember that occasion as well. Talk about the first time you met and how you felt. Let them know that you love them just the same as you did. Divorce usually happens when one person falls out of love with the other but this doesn't mean that they still don't care about this person just that the love is gone. If you have fallen out of love with your spouse then I suggest you find the love again. Just like falling in love with someone, falling out of love with them also takes time. Don't just start your love life over with them, build on it as you go and remember that everything takes time. I am not saying that you should make yourself fall back in love with this person but if you don't want to get a divorce then you better do something.

Dating your spouse

I know that after having kids and being married for a while it might seem almost impossible to have a date with your spouse but you should try. A lot of marriage counselors suggest doing this once a month but I say to do it at least once a week or every other week. The idea behind dating your spouse is that it allows you to have alone time with them. This alone time should not be used to discuss issues but instead, it should be used to cuddle with them or share romantic eye balling with them. If your marriage is on the rocks and you don't want to get a divorce then I would do this at least once a week.

Discussing issues

Every issue needs to be discussed and they will not go away on their own. You need to speak so that you will stay calm and so will your spouse. This type of discussion goes back to what I said earlier about communicating with one another; you need to listen to them and not just hear them. If you are discussing an issue then you need to make sure that the other person is ready for the discussion and if they are not then they will only be half listening to you. Tell them that it is important to discuss things since you want their opinion on what you want to discuss. After you get their opinion you shouldn't be upset with what they say but should take it into consideration and then point out your views on it.

Working it out

If your marriage is headed to divorce and you want to work it out you will probably do just about anything to get your marriage into the stage that it once was in. The first step in doing this is to be the best spouse that you can be. If you are not the best spouse that you can be then why would this person want to be with you? Being a great spouse means that you will want to listen to them and help them in different situations. Helping around the house or with different things such as cooking or mowing the grass is a great way to show that you care enough about them to not want them to have to do everything by themselves.

I can offer you tips on staying away from divorce all night long but the truth is that it has to start with you. You have to be willing to make your marriage work and willing to do whatever it takes to make sure that you don't end up in a divorce and that you have a happy marriage.