"Don't Worry, Be Happy": Best Wedding Advice Ever

Throughout the many days, weeks, and months that my wife and I spent on planning our wedding, which took place last October of 2008, I received a lot of various advice from my friends, family, and co-workers. Of all of the words given to me on how to make this special occasion the best it can be, this is the summary of what every other person has told me:

"Despite the days, weeks, and months planning it, the actual day of your wedding is less than 24 hours and will go faster than the blink of an eye. So remember just two key things: Don't stress out...and have fun!!"

Or in other words that may be adapted from this: "Don't Worry, Be Happy".

Again I say..."Don't Worry, Be Happy".

These words may seem easier said than done (and also cliché on this), but I reassure you that this is the best wedding advice that I've ever received.

Before I explain why four seemingly simple words helped me be rid of all of the stress associated with the "big day", I want to explain briefly what type of a guy I am. To sum it up, I am an "average guy" in regards to having knowledge about weddings. While having a deep desire to meet the woman of my dreams and tie the knot one day, I never was one to constantly think about the planning of it years in advance. Honestly, in being a person that only attended a couple of weddings of his distant relatives, the only real experience that I had about the actual procedures behind a wedding are from movies such as "My Best Friend's Wedding" and "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" and TV shows such as "Whose Wedding Is It Anyway?" and the infamous "Bridezilla". So after I proposed to my girlfriend at the time back in Christmas of 2006, my first thought immediately following one of the best moments in my life, in regards to planning, was "Oh crap...what now?!?".

While my wife-to-be had a little more wedding experience than myself, we both were in the same boat of being horribly anxious in getting all of our ducks together in a row for a nicely planned wedding. To give myself a glimpse of what all we have to do, I had started reading a book called "The Groom's Game Plan", which wanted me the reader to be able to "get to the altar and survive the trip". So within its pages, which appeared to me like a good "Weddings for Dummies" manual, this book had chapters full of every single step that one should (and should not) take in planning out a nice-sized wedding ceremony and reception. To give a good idea of how "massive" I saw these various steps, the checklists, with every single thing me and my wife had to do, were 7 whole pages long. These nicely-sized lists were so intimidating to me with its very specific breakdown of when things had to be done: 9 months before, 6-9 months before, 4-6 months, 2-4 months, 4-6 weeks, 2 weeks and the final countdown with 1 week before one's big day at the altar. This definitely was a lot for one, or even a couple, to quickly process.

So with me and my fiancé's anxiety at an all-time high, we were taking any and all advice given to us at every corner. From everyone's words starting with the phase "Make Sure" ranging from "Make Sure...to do everything way ahead of time" to "Make Sure...to get good deals on your pictures", we were often finding ourselves moving too fast in our planning and stop and really listen to them. But after awhile, the other advice without the words "Make Sure" started to get to us. "Don't Worry, Be Happy". At first when I heard this, I foolishly just thought of the good old 1980s song of the same title by Bobby McFerrin. But when I really stepped back and really thought about this phase, it all came to me. Instead of constantly worrying if every single solitary detail will go over perfectly on me and my wife's wedding day, we should just take a very deep breath, don't worry so much about things that may be out of our control, and just be happy with what we have...each other.

During my wedding, not every single thing went over perfectly. I almost tripped on my church's stairs when walking up during the ceremony. During the dinner reception, we had an unexpected and very awkward toast from a random family member, which didn't go over well at all. And to top it off, after months and months of taste-testing and planning, we honest to goodness didn't ever bother to eat a full piece of our own cherished wedding cake.

So to you people out there who are reading every single wedding book out there, watching every wedding TV show known to man, and putting together the most meticulous, detailed "To-Do" lists ever assembled in wedding history, please also take the time out before, during, and after the actual ceremony to put all of the assumed fears of wedding disasters aside and simply enjoy having the best time of your life.