Do's and Don'ts of Marriage

There Are Some Basic Attributes that Will Help Strengthen or Tear Down Your Marriage

Dionna Sanchez
It is very interesting how the lines of common sense seem to get blurred in marriage. Things we know in our head seem to get lost as we are propelled by emotions.

There are some basic attributes that will help strengthen or tear down your marriage. As simple as they are, they are easily set aside or overlooked. So let's take a look and get a good reminder right now of the important "do's" and "don'ts" in a marriage.

DO pray.

A couple that prays together connects on an emotional level. You unite in your beliefs and values; therefore you bond emotionally and spiritually.

DO show affection.

Don't be afraid to kiss in front of the children or forget that holding hands is fun and magical. Affection breaks down walls that can be built up between the two of you.

DO play and laugh.

Marriage should be fun! There's enough work involved. Don't forget to ENJOY each other in addition to sharing the workload.

DO encourage each other.

Just because you are married doesn't mean you or your spouse don't need encouragement. We all do. Hearing that someone believes in you or is encouraging something that is important to you, makes all the difference in the world in how you feel about yourself and them.

DO invest time in your relationship.

The toughest obstacle for parents is finding time alone together. Make sure you do. Whether it's an hour locked away together before bedtime or a set date night…find what works for your situation.

DON'T refuse to forgive.

We teach our children to forgive, so should we! Some hurts take longer to heal than others, but grudges and resentments only push away love.

DON'T snipe.

Sarcasm is the biggest disease in our homes these days. And, ouch! - it can be painful! Sniping and making sarcastic comments never builds up a home or a marriage. Work now at breaking this harmful habit.

DON'T compare.

Your husband may not be like your friend's husband, but hey, you're not like your friend either! We all have strengths and weaknesses. Comparing only enhances the weaknesses instead of boosting the strengths. And it's never fair to anyone.

DON'T criticize.

We all make mistakes. Give each other some room okay?

DON'T play the blame game.

We all do this. Why is it so tough to say, "I'm Sorry"? Blaming never solves the issue at hand - it only divides you as a couple.

DON'T try to personally win.

Marriage is a team. You should be on the same side.

DON'T yell and fight so hard.

Disagreeing and arguing is bound to come to every marriage. But when you start the trend of yelling, slamming doors, etc - that can become a habit that ends up crippling communication. Learn to be constructive and practical when you disagree or take a time out until your emotions calm a little.

Sometimes it is good to be reminded of things. In the case of our marriages, I think it's vital.

Here's to the health of your marriage!


~ Dionna Sanchez will have been married to her husband Eliseo for 10 years in August. Visit Emphasis On Moms for more encouraging marriage articles at http://www.EmphasisOnMoms.com/

Published by Dionna Sanchez

Dionna is the Founder of the Emphasis On Moms Ministry at www.EmphasisOnMoms.com Dionna's heart & compassion for others is huge....you will love her honesty, warmth, and tenderness in everything she writes.  View profile

6 Comments

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  • mary8/23/2008

    Im in a realeationship for 4 years now, after being married to the same man for 30 years. I believe in marriage. we both have kids from previous marriages, mine are all on their own supporting themselves,and he still finianciall supports half of his kids and their familys. he wont get married because he feels he should take care of his kids, and we fight about this alot. I feel that he thinks that if we get married Ill be able to have say so about this situation. then he has the nearve to say I just want to get my hands on his money. does this sound like a relatioship I should persue or drop. oh by the way he expects to live at my house and not pay.

  • mel8/3/2008

    i totally agree

  • Dr. Jodi1/16/2008

    Nice and to the point! Good work!

  • Aude Cogitare3/8/2007

    I agree with most of your article. However, I disagree with one thing: criticism. I don't think criticism is a bad thing. I don't understand why you'd advise spouses to avoid it. I think criticism is essentially good, and if you can't trust your spouse to give you honest criticism, who can you expect it from? However, comments that are rude, purposefully hurtful or intentionally meant to tear someone down or make them feel sad should not be tolerated--but I would not consider anything of this nature criticism.

  • Sue Ellen Kubiak3/8/2007

    Great article! I really enjoyed reading that. It was to the point and had really good advice. Thank you for sharing this!

  • Kassidy Emmerson2/5/2007

    Good points! Now if we could just remember to use them in our daily lives!

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