Do's and Don'ts of a Tailgate Party

The Tailgate party is a legendary pre-sporting event tradition. When done right, you can make a few new friends, temporarily forget about your team's losing record, and maybe even make a little money on the side(allegedly). When done wrong,the whole experience will snowball from an unpleasant day to a horrible following week.

Do:
Share your food with other sports fans. Food has been used as an olive branch in many difference occasions throughout history. Thanksgiving for example is a holiday that is centered around gathering and consuming vast amounts of food. Celebrate another glorious sporting event by offering a steak or some chili to your fellow sports fan.

Don't:
Throw anybody down to the concrete, and force feed them your wife's casserole. Not everybody likes your wife's casserole. I don't care how many people said otherwise, they were probably lying just to get you off of them. The truth isn't always pretty...Much like her casserole! I'm sure you think it's terrific, but I try to stay away form anything that looks like the stuff I hurl whenever I get stomach flu.

Do:
Support the home team with the use of a little trash talk. Trash talk helps you get amped up for the game, and it's also a good way to kill time before the event begins. Some may think boastfulness of any kind is in bad taste. truth is, a little trash talk never hurt anyone.

Don't:
Shoot your mouth off to anyone without shouting distance by making physical threats. That, ladies and gentlemen, would really be in bad taste. It doesn't help that you wore a partially ripped yellow shirt , just so you could imitate Hulk Hogan,, tear it in dramatic fashion, and do a pre-game pose down. Yeah, that's not good for anybody.

Do:
Wear your team colors. Get some use out of that expensive throwback jersey you bought a few months back. Heck, you can let your kid apply some paint to your face as well. It won't make your team play any harder, but applying war paint and pretending you can will them to victory adds to the experience.

Don't:
Apply full body war paint while I'm trying to eat my hot dog. Seriously, stop it! You should start bringing a shower curtain to the games or something. The sight of your unkept, jiggly body glistening in the sunlight, is not something anybody should have to see while they're eating. It's not cool man. Definitely not cool.