Drama Mama's

As a first time mother I was eager to find other mother's who were experienced and going through what I was. I wanted support and companionship, to know I was not alone and that I was doing just fine. The first place I looked was online. What a bad idea!

The first place I went was babycenter.com. Baby Center is a great resource for news articles and information in regards to pregnancy and your baby. What it's not good for is support. When mother's get online the claws come out. There is no need to be polite or supportive because no one ever has to meet face to face. Some mother's are down right mean. If you don't fit in with the majority or have a differing opinion on parenting, they'll attack and often they do so by commenting on the things that hurt the most to any parent. They'll tell you that your kid will grow up to hate you, that you're destroying your child's life, that they're neglected and abused, etc. After a month at Baby Center I was forced to leave because of the mental anguish I was going through daily dealing with hostile mother's who didn't agree with how I was parenting my child.

The second place I visited was Families.com. This site proved to be a little better until it merged with another site and everything went downhill from there. Much of the same things I encountered at Baby Center happened at Families but ten times worse. This is where I encountered the Extended Rear Facing Nazi's. My daughter was turned forward at age one because of connivence to me due to the car I had. Well these Extended Rear Facing Nazi's went on the attack as if I was putting my child in mortal danger by doing what I had done. Needless to say I left that community soon after.

The last place I visited was a MySpace group for 2006 Mother's. I should have known better, MySpace isn't exactly populated with the most mature of people. This group was on attack right off the bat. I only made one comment and already was attacked. I didn't spend much time in this group posting, I just read. There is a small clique of mother's who attack most anyone who joins. I can see how very off putting this could be to other mothers.

So much drama is experienced online, probably because there are no repercussions to what you say usually. My experience has led me to seek out real life mother's to talk to, because they'll be truthful but respectful at the same time. The circle of mother's I know in person now, have no problems expressing their opinions on a variety of things, but they don't do it in a hostile manner and they never accuse anyone of bad parenting. I enjoy going to them because I know I can count on them being honest but respectful and that's what I was looking for in the first place.

My advice to new mother's out there is to find support through people in your local area, not online. Sites are useful for information, but not for gaining companionship and support. That is found through real live people who can be there for you should you need it.