Dressing like Bratz or Britney Spears?: Teaching Modesty in an Immodest Age

A few years back, well-known retailer Abercrombie and Fitch introduced thongs in sizes that fit eight and ten year old girls. There was an outcry (as well there should have been) from many parents, particularly because these thongs had sayings like "eye candy" and "wink wink" on them. Although the thongs were defended by the popular clothing chain as being "light-hearted" and "cute", they were eventually pulled from store shelves. Today, more and more little girls and teens are being pressured to dress like their Bratz dolls or popular pop icons like Britney Spears and Jessica Simpson. Is this how we want our daughters to look? How do we emphasize modesty and why is it so important?

Modesty is important because it is all about self-respect. A self-respecting girl or woman will not want to be looked at as merely a sex object. This is a great reason to wear clothing that covers more than the bare minimum. Mothers need to teach their daughters that modesty is not about being dull and boring, or about being "out of style", but about having enough respect for oneself to want to look attractive without attracting the wrong kind of attention from men or boys. In fact, men and boys tend to treat women better who display modesty and self-confidence.

Emphasize to your daughter(s) that modesty does not mean she has to dress in long skirts and bonnets. It does not mean she cannot look beautiful. There is a lot of stylish clothing out there that does not show half a girl's belly or rear end. It is unfortunate that so many clothing companies manufacture items for little girls like "low-rise" jeans and half-shirts. Thankfully, some clothing makers have realized that some mothers want their children to look like children and not like the latest pop idols.

What are some stores that sell modest yet stylish clothing for children? Land's End, LL Bean, and Hanna Andersson all have clothing that let little girls look like the children they still are. All three companies have online stores, and Land's End clothing is also available at Sears. If you look carefully when shopping in the mall or department stores, it is possible to still find modest clothing, it just may take longer.

For teenagers, finding modest clothing may be a bit harder. It may also be more difficult to convince your teen that modesty is the way to go. Remind her that she wants to be noticed by guys for the right reasons-not just thought of as a sexual object. In the end, remember that you are the parent, and if you find a piece of clothing objectionable or inappropriate, you have the final say. However, it may be fun to go shopping together with your teenage daughter and search for clothing that is stylish, fun, yet provides good skin coverage.