Effective Communication Tips

1. It's not about you! Whenever you communicate, the one on the receiving end is always more important that the one on the sending. Think of your audience first; I mean before you speak, hit that send button, post that blog or mail that letter. Ask yourself: What do I want them to do after they receive this? How do I want them to feel when they read or hear what I have to say? What kind of an impact will this have on our relationships after they receive it? By putting your mind on the receivers end and thinking about your desired outcome, you will be more apt to work your content toward that outcome.

2. Make sure you are both speaking the same language. People often say one thing and mean another, for example: If a wife says she has nothing to wear it means she has nothing new. If a man says he has nothing to wear it means he has nothing clean. Your ASAP may mean as soon as you are finished with what you're doing while mine might be do it right now. The same applies when you are on the receiving end; don't assume that you comprehend everything exactly as they intended you to. If it's important enough to argue over, always ask and if needed clarify.

3. Make sure you and your audience are focused. Our minds have the ability to process information at an extremely high rate of speed and if what we are hearing or reading doesn't interest us, our mind goes on vacation. That is why you get half way through a page and say; "What did I just read?" Get to the point, use as few words as possible and make sure the other person (and yourself) isn't zoning. If you find your mind drifting, stop, apologize and ask them to repeat what they said. It is better to ask than to nod your head yes and look like a fool later. If you can see that your audience is drifting, stop, repeat the key points you already shared and close quickly.

4. When you hear something that upsets you Q.T.I.P. Quit taking it personal! Whenever we get emotionally upset and angry our blood pressure rises and our muscles tense up restricting blood flow to the brain. When your brain does not get the proper amount of blood it also doesn't get enough oxygen which affects our minds ability to function clearly. Statistics show that when a person is angry to the point of yelling, their IQ drops as much as 50 points; thus the reason we say and do those things we would never do in our right minds. Please remember this; people do not intentionally plan on upsetting us and they don't intentionally think of ways that they can hurt our feelings. Before responding, ask yourself if you think they really mean what they said. Do not respond immediately, especially if your find yourself getting upset or you too will find your brain going out to lunch and responding in an inappropriate manner. Get as much distance between you and your audience so you can think rationally. Rarely does the situation demand an immediate response and more often than not, doing so causes much more harm than waiting.

Summary:It's never about you; make sure you are speaking the same language, stay focused and make sure they do the same and most importantly, "People don't WANT to tick you off!"

If you know anyone that could use these tips, please share them with them; there is a "Share" link and the top of the page to do so.

Make it a great day!

Bob