Effexor: Side Effects of Withdrawal May Include Self-inflicted Chaos

Over 2 years ago I began using Effexor as an anti-depressant under the observation of a physician recommended by a family member. Initially, I was diagnosed as having Post-partum Depression, which came as a shock to me. My understanding of the diagnosis was limited to the information I heard about on television; stories of mothers drowing their young children, or other forms of torture. I dismissed the diagnosis and began the treatment with 37.5 miligrams, the lowest dose prescribed. I instantly felt elation and satisfaction that I can only describe as artifical happiness. In other words, in my mind I knew I should be sad, crying, or obsessing over something. Instead, I smiled and chatted and went about my everyday business as if nothing were wrong. Soon enough, the dosage seemed to have little effect and I was soon back at the doctor's office, requesting an up-dose of the drug. He instead suggested I try another drug, Lexapro. I complied with his request and soon after, I began self mutilation and even contemplated suicide.

Not more that two weeks after the switch, I returned to his office and immediately requested to be put back on the Effexor. Again, he suggested another drug which I rejected. I switched doctor's and began treatment on Effexor again, this time at 75 miligrams. Elation and artificial happiness again became an everday thing for almost a year. By then I had been diagnosed with Bipolar disorder. I was in shock and disbelief when I learned of the diagnosis and I told my friends and family, thinking they would have the same reaction. Unfortunately, everyone who learned of my disorder agreed that my behavior and symptoms matched the diagnosis perfectly. I took a step back and did some research on the disorder and discovered that some of the symptoms were very familiar to a certain extent. The rapid moodswings, violent temper, uncontrollable shopping and borrowing money were just a few, yet not enough to convince me that I was Bipolar. I was on 75 miligrams for over a month before my doctor decided that I should be taking 150 miligrams. I was a little concerned, but didn't think much of the increase. I had confessed to him that I previously had suffered from Bulimia Nervosa and took the increase as a precautionary action to prevent a relapse. During the time of my new dosage, I learned that a close family member was also taking Effexor for anxiety attacks and was now also on another medication for panic disorders. She went from weighing almost 160lbs to under 100lbs.

I became concerned about the side effects and began to research the drug in more detail. After deciding that the side effects would potentially cause more damage than the shopping sprees or moodswings, I quickly began to decrease the dosage, determined to eventually wean myself off completely. The side effects began rather rapidly. The first sign that I was withdrawing from the drug was headaches. The headaches were long lasting and caused confusion. I couldn't focus on anything, from work to school and even personal relationships. I was zoned. Even my vision was effected by the decrease. I would drive on the highway and without warning, I'd be tailgating some innocent driver or running someone off the road. I felt like the issues could be dealt with soon after I completely detoxed myself from the drug. I decided to stop the medication completely. My mood quickly changed from cheery to dreary. I looked for any reason to argue with my boyfriend. I became short with my mother to the point that I diassociated myself from her and kept my daughter away from her too. I then shut my daughter out almost completely, to the point where she preferred to stay with her step-dad rather than put up with my crying spells and anger fits. Physically, I was drained and felt like I was being tortured from the inside out. My stomach would turn, my eyes felt like they were ready to fall out of the sockets, my head pounded and I felt like I was about to explode in a fit of rage. This went on for days into weeks until one evening left me with a decision to either begin treatment again, or live my life in solitude as a danger to myself and those I loved.

It began as a simple poker party. My boyfriend and I had drank a couple of beers and called it a night. On our way home, he asked me if I was feeling ok because I had been quiet the whole evening and ignored everyone's attempts at conversation with me. I was easily angered by his questioning and began to have one of my fits. Usually, this would happen at home, where I could storm out of the room and cut mysef off from his confrontations and accusations. This night, however, we were in his car. I felt trapped in the argument and wanted to be left alone. I panicked, knowing I could not escape. I begged him to pull over at the nearest gas station so I could remove myself from the car and breathe. He refused. I told him I'd have someone pick me up so he didn't have to wait. Again, he refused. He said he could not leave me alone in the middle of the night in an unfamiliar area.

I became violently angry and opened the door to the car as he was driving. I was desperate to the point where I was willing to throw myself out of the car to avoid talking about my withdrawl. My boyfriend pulled me by my arm, causing him to swerve and nearly lose control of the car. He locked the doors and I attempted instead to throw myself out of the window. I can't remember what happened after that. I was told that we nearly lost control of the car again, and in the process of being pulled back in from the window, I hit my head. I woke up at my boyfriends house, in bed with him looking after me. Needless to say, he was furious and I again went through the cycle of apologies and promises of never having that sort of occurance again. Not too long after, we went on vacation in Las Vegas, where my temper ended our vacation with my boyfriend on the floor of the hotel room, with me kicking him repeatedly and screaming obscenities at him. I later ran through the hotel casino barefoot, trying to avoid his confrontations again, and another apology.

After this last incident, I decided that I was going to lose everyone who cares about me if my behavior wasn't corrected. I discussed the issue with my boyfriend who told me he could no longer handle my episodes, and asked me to please return to my doctor. I began treatment again. Since then, my dosage has been increased from 150 to 220 miligrams. I have also been prescribed another medication for Borderline Personality Disorder, which has miraculously helped with my shopping sprees and excessive borrowing. My relationship with my boyfriend is extremely healthy now, and we can have a discussion without my fits of rage and dangerous stunts, even if we are arguing.

My advice to anyone considering taking Effexor for any type of personality or social disorder: do your research. Consider the side effects of the drug that you are considering before you begin treatment. Talk to your doctor in detail about all of your symptoms; do not hold anything back. The more your doctor knows about your symptoms, the better he or she can diagnose you. Most importantly, before removing yourself from any treatment, talk to your doctor about the possible side effects and measures to possibly prevent or lessen them.