Ego...Friend or Foe?

Many of us become confused at the definition of egoist versus egotist. Let's take a moment to clarify. The key to the differentiation lies in the letter "T." If we associate the letter "T" to talking, then we can more easily remember that the egotist is not shy about his perceived abilities and not cautious in talking about them. These are the people we judge as full of themselves, unless we are this person. In that case, we recognize that we are explaining reality, not embellishing it.

The egoist differs in that it represents a person with an ego, which the Encarta Dictionary defines as "the part of the mind containing consciousness." In other words, this includes everybody.

Well, if we all have an ego, then it must be a good thing...right? We value self-confidence, measure self-esteem, promote self-respect and worship "individuality." Is it not fair to say our culture drives us in this direction from an early age? It is a characteristic of success.

But is there danger from an overinflated ego? If it expands too much, will it convert into egotism? Can measures be put in place to keep the ego in check no matter how strong and developed it might become? Are people with less ego nicer people? If so, should we be trying to diminish our ego and strive for eventual elimination?

These are interesting questions and a very interesting approach can be found in the science of Kabbalah. Kabbalah tells us that there is a Creator, who is all and everything, complete oneness and unity. The Creator is a 100% altruistic loving force because, after all, if the Creator is already everything then he lacks nothing. The Creator wants nothing but to give pleasure, but who will receive this pleasure? For this, he created the creature (mankind) and he gave the creature the desire to receive, so he would have someone to give to.

We are the desire to receive, which is the exact opposite of the Creator. As far from being like the Creator as possible. This desire to receive, this separation from the Creator, is what creates our "I." This sense of "I" is our ego. We feel everything inside our skin as "me" and everything outside is not.

Back to the question of whether the ego is friend or foe. Kabbalah explains that it is neither and both. The Creator created us, so we cannot be evil. This was the purpose of Creation. But neither is it good in and of itself. It just is.

The concept of good and evil is only pertinent when we take a look at the way we use our desire to receive. If we use it strictly for our own self-benefit, acquiring more and more pleasure just for ourselves, Kabbalah defines it as evil. Our pleasure comes at the expense of others.

The other option is to transform our egoism so that we attain the altruistic qualities of the Creator and learn how to give unconditionally. The trick is to learn how to receive His gifts in order to please Him. Just like when you go to a dinner party and enjoy the meal. You are enjoying the food while at the same time giving pleasure to the person who prepared the food for you. How does this manifest in the world around us, though? If we can change our nature so that we receive our pleasure from ensuring that other people receive what they need, then the ego has been transformed into its "good" aspect - altruism.

The science of Kabbalah teaches a methodology whereby you take the power of the ego and then balance it with the altruism of the Creator. Little by little we absorb the altruistic, loving qualities of the Creator. By doing so, we have achieved the purpose of our existence, and egotism will have lost all power.