Elderly People Deserve to Be Treated like Heroes-Not Zeroes

She sits in her chair near the window. This view provides her the chance to watch the birds outside her window as they bathe in the bird bath. An accident that occurred in the early 1970's has left her with limited mobility. She rarely leaves the house because of these limitations. She I am speaking of is my 84 year old grandmother.

My grandmother is one of my heroes. In 1976, she faced the news no spouse wants to hear. My grandfather, only 49 years old at the time, had advanced colon cancer. The doctor said his life could not be saved. One month and two weeks later, she buried the love of her life. She would continue in life not dating because her love was gone. She faced a drug addiction ripping apart the life of her oldest grandchild, the loss of a grandchild at the age of 8, the cancer diagnosis of another grandchild at ages 9, 15, and 30. She is the last of her immediate family to survive. My grandmother is tough as nails and with each visit, I learn more about her. We should treat every aged person in a similar way. They have much to teach us.

My grandmother is one of the lucky ones. She lives next door to my parents so they visit often as does my aunt. We bring her great-grandchildren to visit in an attempt to cheer her up. As she sits there, I can't help but look for the features she had in a picture I own of her and my grandfather taken about 1946. I see in her every person who is alive today. We are all aging and some will be blessed to see 8+ decades of life. From what my grandmother has told me, those 8 decades have been filled with many up and downs.

Neglect is the most serious issue facing advanced senior citizens and the saddest thing about neglect is the family can sometimes prevent it. Sometimes neglect stems from personality-perhaps the aged is depressed and angry. In the final stage of life according to noted psychologist Erik Erikson, we all go through the stage Integrity versus Despair. In this stage, a person successfully resolves the crisis if the person does not fear death or the loss of self-sufficiency. Many people do not resolve this crisis. The suicide rate among the aged is the highest of any age group possibly for this reason.

Many times when the aged go into nursing homes they are not visited by family. Oftentimes when the advanced senior citizen lives at home, people also fail to visit. The aged may have dementia and younger people may not want to see him or her in that condition. The problem with not visiting your family member or friend is being unaware of mistreatment from other people and of being involved in it yourself to some extent due to neglect.

Why does abuse of the advanced senior citizen happen? We should value our elders and respect them for who they are. In many cases, the aged is a parent or grandparent who helped to raise the person who mistreats them. Why does this happen? In the home, often the caregiver is overwhelmed by responsibilities. In nursing home facilities workers may be underpaid so they may have a low frustration threshold. Family members may not push the issue because of fear of the mistreatment being unable to be pinned down to one person and hearing the words, "If you don't like it here, you can always take your grandparent/parent out."

Neglect

The primary form of mistreatment among the aged comes in the form of neglect. Neglect accounts for more than 50 percent of all cases of mistreatment among the aged. As mentioned above, friends and family may not visit the person regularly. Neglect can take many forms-such as not visiting the aged, being in denial the aged needs as much help as he or she does, and other forms such as nursing home workers not caring for the aged as needed by leaving the person dirty and susceptible to bed sores.

Financial Woes

Aged people are at a much greater risk of extortion. A caregiver might use the aged person's credit cards or accounts without their approval, forge the person's signature, steal cash, and possibly even steal their identity. Because of diminished mental capacities, many of the aged are at an increased risk of falling prey to announcements of prizes they have "won", phony charities, and insurance fraud. People may show up as willing to help the aged have companionship and at the aged person's reading of the will, the person becomes the beneficiary. Since many aged people buy companionship, these cases are often not prosecuted.

Physical and Emotional Abuse

Physical mistreatment can take several forms. Physical abuse of the aged may refer to the non-accidental use of force that results in pain or the inappropriate use of drugs, restraint, and confinement. Emotional abuse can involve intimidation or threats of sending the aged to the nursing home, humiliation, and habitual blame. Abuse that falls under these subtypes may be caused by ignoring the aged, isolating the person from family and friends, and being a menace to the person.

Sexual Abuse

Another form of abuse among the aged is sexual abuse. Sexual abuse can mean the act of rape but forcing the person to watch pornographic movies or undress when he or she does not want to constitutes abuse as well.

Healthcare Abuse

Sometimes doctors and hospital personnel commit fraud and abuse among the elderly. The elderly are less likely to pay attention to medical bill charges and that lends the way for them to be double billed for medical care, being charged for medical care that was never provided, overmedicating or under medicating and Medicaid fraud.

Signs of elderly abuse are often mistaken for dementia and age. Some warning signs of mistreatment among the elderly are changes in behavior or personality of the person, tension between the person and his or her caregiver, unexplained signs of injury such as bruises, behavior from the elderly person that mimics dementia such as rocking or mumbling to oneself, unexplained genital bleeding, unexplained sexually transmitted diseases, unusual weight loss or malnutrition, bed sores, being left dirty, changes in the financial position of the aged, items or cash missing from the elderly person's home, duplicate billings for the same medical services, and evidence of inadequate care even when the bills are paid in due.

Elderly people who are at greater risk for abuse

Elderly people who are at greater risk of abuse are those who are less likely to understand what is happening in the environment around them. The intensity of the elderly person's dementia is one factor that makes an elderly person more susceptible to abuse. If the elderly person was once an abusive parent or spouse, the other spouse or adult children may not want to care for the person. Elderly people who are at greater risk for abuse are also those who have a tendency toward verbal and physical aggression that may or may not involve dementia.

Though not all cases of advanced senior citizen abuse can be changed, much of it begins in the home. Pay attention to the elderly person's needs and help when he or she is unable to help his or herself. If you find yourself prone to neglect or another abusive action toward the elderly person, be assured most caregivers who go through this experience are pushed beyond their own capabilities at times. Seek out therapy for yourself in this case. If an elderly person you know is being abused, seek out someone who can help such as a doctor, friend, and another family member. The phone number 1-800-677-1116 is available to help you from 9:00 am through 8:00 pm Eastern time.

The saddest thing is most cases of advanced senior citizen abuse go unreported. Statistics say for every case of elder abuse reported another 12 or 13 are not. Certain types of elderly abuse are subject to criminal prosecution and should be reported.

Many advanced senior citizens will not report the abuse on their own because they do not believe anyone would care anyway. The elderly person worries he or she will be seen as paranoid, demented, or illogical.

Ways to Help Reduce Elderly Abuse

One way to help reduce advanced senior citizen abuse is to listen to the elderly and their caregivers. If you suspect abuse, do not wait it out---intervene. All of us can educate others about how to recognize abuse of the elderly. Do not take the aged person's word mistreatment is not occurring sometimes. At times he or she may feel ashamed and be unwilling to face their accuser. This unwillingness is especially so when the abuser is a family member who treats the elderly person like a child-threatening to take things away from them or telling lies that may get the elderly person in trouble. Suicidal tendencies in the elderly person may be a sign of abuse. The aged person may feel no one will believe them if they come forward with truth of the abuse. Suspected cases can also be reported at the elderly abuse hotline located at the Department of Health and Human Services in the area where the mistreated aged person resides. Social workers may be able to get paperwork filed so the abused person can be removed from the situation and allow authorities to place a warrant for the arrest of the offender.

Effects of long term abuse of the elderly

Isolation and loneliness are not uncommon feelings among the aged who have been mistreated. The abused may also express emotional fearfulness. The elderly who has been abused may have a difficult time trusting even those who mean no harm. Physical acting out and verbal mistreatment of others are also components of the person's being abused. Poor self esteem, detachment from others, loss of interest in everyday activities and acting out physically at others may be signs of long term mistreatment.

Ultimately attention needs to be given to the needs to the advanced senior citizen and the caregiver as well. Crisis in mistreatment of the aged must provide immediate protective measures for the aged, immediate counseling for the abuser to help them learn means of control, and alleviating family or social problems that may accelerate tension and lead to mistreatment in the home.