Ellen Pompeo's Playboy Pics Reveal...

...more about Ellen Pompeo's character than anything else in January's issue of Playboy.

Whoa, Ellen Pompeo got naked for Playboy ? is what I thought this morning when I saw one of the pics of Ellen Pompeo from her Playboy spread.

But further review of the piece about Ellen Pompeo's Playboy spread revealed that the actress in fact did not get naked for the old geezer mag, which made me proud and think: Good job, Ellen Pompeo! Way to foil all the folks eagerly typing in "Ellen Pompeo naked pics" and "Ellen Pompeo nude pics" and "Ellen Pompeo Playboy spread" today.

(Go home and ogle the wife of your youth instead. Order her this hot number and when it arrives, tell her to ditch the sweats and put it on, no matter how fat she thinks she looks. Yeah, the big flabby wifey may not be as hot as Ellen Pompeo nor the woman modeling it, but hey...you're no Josh Duhamel anymore either.)

I admit I get pangs of jealousy when I read and view pics of women like Ellen Pompeo, who at 37, is my same age. It's like Ellen Pompeo is living some alter-image life of mine: a hit show, world travels, no kids, skinny as all get out. (Though Ellen Pompeo did say in the text that accompanies her Playboy pics that she wants to gain weight.)

But then I remember that all that glitters ain't gold in Ellen Pompeo's tinsel town. Don't get me wrong, I still make the most of products like Crest WhiteStrips Renewal Age Defying Strips to keep the paint on the barn looking new, but I also revel in what I've got right here in the heartland.

Which reminds the mom in me to ask: Have y'all seen this new Listerine Agent Cool Blue Plaque-Detecing Rinse that turns the plaque blue in your mouth so you know where to brush? Gotta be the coolest thing I've ever seen:

Oh well. Back to the topic at hand: Ellen Pompeo's Playboy pics: I wonder what Chris Ivery, Ellen Pompeo's fiancee, thinks about his future wife's Playboy pics? May he's not the jealous type.