Emetophobia: A First Hand Account

I have suffered from emetophobia for the past thirty years. emetophobia is the irrational fear of vomit and vomiting. It is ranked as the fifth most common phobia, although most people have never even heard of it. People with emetophobia have different symptoms. For me I can not be around anyone who might vomit or else I go into a panic attack.

So how often are you around someone who "might" vomit. well you would be surprised. I am personally afraid to go to a bar because in my mind drinking equals throwing up. I am afraid of just about anyone who is not feeling well, and if my husband has heartburn, it's the guest bedroom for me.

I have a one year old daughter, and she has and will continue to throw up on occasion. I live in fear that I will not be able to take care of her in the manner that she needs to be taken care of when she has a stomach virus. I am afraid that my panic attack will be so severe that I can't give her the help or attention that she needs.

Last year when she did vomit for the first time I was with my husband. Oddly enough I was the one comforting her and cleaning up after her. He was in panic mode. The natural mother instinct kicked in that one time, but will it kick in next time? Although I didn't go into a full fledged panic attack I did end up washing my hands just about every five minutes for the next two days. I used purell like it was going out of style, and I stayed up at night because I was afraid that if I fell asleep I might lose control and get sick.

The rituals an emetophobe adheres to are rather ridiculous. I know I am very picky about what foods I eat, will not eat at restaurants because I don't know if the cook has washed his hands, and people often wonder if I am anorexic. I also carry around an arsenal of medications such as ginger pills, compazine, and coke syrup. I don't want to be caught without a medication that could help me if I do in fact feel like I need to vomit.

Emetophobia is about control. It is about controlling your body and ensuring that you do not throw up. There is no cure to date, but cognitive behavioral therapy can and does help. I am also on SSRI's to treat my emetophobia and it has given me more control over my life.

If you are reading this and think that you have emetophobia I urge you to get help. Seek the assistance of a mental health professional and talk about this phobia. You will be glad you did.