Emmett "Doc" Brown Arrested for Attempted Molestation

(AP) - Renowned physicist Emmett "Doc" Brown was arrested earlier today on suspicions of inappropriate relations with a minor, and endangering the welfare of a child. Brown, who gained public notoriety in 1985 with the invention of a time machine, was the subject of a previous investigation, although the statute of limitations prevented authorities from making an arrest, since the alleged crime took place in 1885.

Brown's Delorean sports car was thoroughly searched after his arrest, and authorities were stunned to find child pornography stashed away under a massive quantity of plutonium. Libyan terrorists have stepped forward and admitted to selling Brown the illegal nuclear materials, citing that Brown preferred to meet in the Twin Pines Mall parking lot, where witnesses claim they saw him moments before the transaction persuading young children to pet his dog and feel his wily grey hair. One Libyan noted that when he brought his young son along on one transaction, Brown seemed distracted as he gave the boy "creepy, lingering stares."

Authorities also seized massive quantities of the date-rape drug "roofies" stashed inside of a flux capacitor.

The boy who accused Brown of lewd behavior was interviewed last night by police. He was allegedly enticed into Brown's Delorean with the promise of Nike "power laces" and a "hoverboard." Brown then drove the boy to the old clock tower. The boy quickly realized something was wrong when Brown lured him into the tower's basement and attempted to "expose his jiggawatts."

When asked for a quote, Doctor Brown continuously repeated the words "great scott" which authorities believe may be a potential reference to a second young victim named Scott.