Emotions and the 6 Stages of the Teenage Years

It can be helpful to understand the phases of the teenage years. Ken and Elizabeth Mellor identify these in their book, Teen Stages, (Finch Publishing, 2004). They say that each stage is marked by distinctive features and they normally run in a predictable sequence. Confusion arises as the stages often overlap, manifesting as mood swings and sudden changes in the teenager's behavior.

Phases in Early Teenage Years

Thirteen-year-olds are typified by the baby stage. They alternate between the need to be nurtured and cared for and the process of maturing and becoming less dependent on their parents. During this stage, they often find it hard to cope with new challenges and adapt to the changes in their bodies. Emotional outbursts and childish behavior are common.

Fourteen-year-olds go through the dissenting stage. This is marked by temper tantrums and angry outbursts. Door slamming is common and hostility may rear its head. Fourteen-year-olds are better able to cope with life than thirteen-year-olds and may show great passion and enthusiasm for it. It is important not to be intimidated by an angry teen and to set firm boundaries for him.

Phases in Mid Teenage Years

Fifteen-year-olds are generally much calmer and less hostile than they were a year previously. This is called the fledgling stage. While there may be temper flare-ups, they normally become more calm, open and cooperative as the year progresses. Fifteen-year-olds are at an age where the adult world is beginning to interest them and they ask a lot of questions and observe those around them. Their social activities often expand at this time and it is important to teach them when to say no and how to discern when a situation is turning bad.

Sixteen-year-olds tend to swing more to the rebellious side and Ken and Elizabeth Mellor describe this as the sweet and sour stage. The teens are often difficult and obnoxious at home but charming and helpful with other adults. This is part of their struggle to become their own person and make their own decisions. When they are not snapping at their parents, they can hold intelligent discussions and show greater responsibility and independence than in previous years.

Phases in Late Teenage Years

Seventeen-year-olds are romantics. They have done a lot of thinking and are generally at the age where they are becoming responsible, likeable young adults. They start to detach from their parents and spend more time with social groups outside the home. They may be impractical at times but it does no harm for parents to share their enthusiasm for plans and dreams. While showing a measure of maturity, they are still naive in many ways.

Eighteen- and nineteen-year-olds are classed as world leaders. As they continue to mature, their beliefs and ideals become clearer and they begin to behave in a more adult fashion. They are excited about their place in the world and also a little intimidated as they try and find where they fit in. Social causes are important to them.

Teenagers are notoriously difficult but as they pass through the early, mid and late teenage years, they become more stable and approachable. Parents are able to aid this process if they understand what is happening. Each stage has advantages and disadvantages but generally teenagers emerge into their twenties as mature, sensible young people.