Empire of the Ants (1977) - a Movie Review

Empire of the Ants is a 1977 sci-fi horror movie starring Joan Collins and Robert Lansing. Joan Collins is a scam artist who tries to sell undesirable Florida property to unsuspecting buyers; buyers who are pretty much just there for the free boat ride and free food. Unbeknownst to them, the beach and neighboring town is overrun by mutated ants.

I gave the movie a shot because my boyfriend has fond childhood memories of the movie. Now those memories are replaced with "what the heck was I thinking" thoughts. I am sure the movie was good in 1977 but now it just sucks. It reinforces my opinion never to watch a movie as old or older then me. I wasn't bothered by the cheap special effects or the fact that the scenes of the giant ants were just the same scene used over and over. What really bugged me was the stereotypical cast that was completely unlikable. The main characters were a scam artist, adulterous gold digger, alcoholic divorcee, and a crabby boat driver just looking for his paycheck. By the end of the movie, I was cheering for them to get ate by killer ants. Unfortunately three out of the four survived.

The beginning of the movie mentions that the movie is based on a story by H.G.Wells. I have never read the story but I am just assuming the writer of the movie butchered H.G. Wells originally story. At least I hope so because the plot was really terrible. The first half of the movie is just an introduction of the unlikable characters and the tour of the Florida property. Finally thirty minutes into the movie the ants appear and start eating people because not only are they mutated ants they are also carnivorous ants. Hmmm...I always thought ants liked sweets. Perhaps their new flesh eating craving is a side effect of the toxic waste dumped in the ocean. The toxic waste that looked a lot like silver fingernail polish. Anyway, people die and the rest travel through the everglades to try to find safety in the next town. The survivors quickly learn the next town is not a refuge because the citizens have been brainwashed into running the sugar factory to feed the army of ants. Ah ha, so the ants do like sweets.

The crabby boat driver saves the day by waving a lit flare in the face of the queen ant before she has a chance of brainwashing him with white smoke that she emanates from her body. The alcoholic divorcee sets fire to the factory and the four survivors drive off in a boat; the end, finally. The plot was very slow moving. I had to stop myself from fast-forwarding through this terrible movie. I give the movie 1 out of 5 stars. The movie does deserve 1 star for Joan Collins death scene.