Ephemeral

oh crane arms, open yourself and let the greasy rain soothe rusty hinges tired

weeping over crumbling bridges.

so they fall together over time; open yourself and catch them all

i went walking on the empty highway while everyone slowly faded to dust. the sun was shining for it's last day and there wasn't a cloud to be found. i heard the final music notes playing softly in the background and slipping off the edge of the earth. the mud was drying, the sand fell into the cracks of the sidewalks and all of the grass grew tall and out of sight until i could not tell the difference between land and sky. i kept on walking and walked right on past my first kiss, through the first time i rode a bike, and beside the first time i ever swam underwater. i pushed through the skyscrapers made out of sunflowers and reached out for the last sunset.

all of the mirrors i had ever looked into melted away. the harmonies that unlocked my mind fell apart; i could smell the ocean just miles away but i knew there was more to come before that. i felt the swerves of various almost accidents, spinning out of control, flying through the air. smashing back down into reality. i saw the flames coming out of the tower. i was the boards being pulled out from beneath his feet. i wanted to be the uncombust of the shrapnel and take it all away. i wished i was the anti-terror and as soon as i did it was back to snowy weather. the snow, the cleansing rush of falling water mixed with soft down.

i began to run as fast as i could, leaping when i felt i should and spinning and twirling and tumbling across the empty highway. screaming and singing and whooping and laughing. and crying. i felt the effervescent happiness inside of me wanted to escape and give itself away across the lifetime. i wanted to imbue the shy pavement with my memories before i crumbled into pieces and got washed away. my rhapsody needed to be heard, though i knew it was impossible.

and that's when i realized as the sky slowly became tinted with pinks and oranges reds and yellows, this was the last sunset, ever. this was the last time that i would see the sun go down. it was the last time i'd see the sun. i would never feel the warmth, i could never go walking and enjoy the contrast of shadows and colors. soon my own hands right down to the fingers would begin to disappear and i would not be able to get down on my knees and bow to the ground and everything it has ever given to me. i could bury my hands deep inside the earth and feel the dirt get underneath my nails. sand and dirt along with water and plants made up the basic composition of life. who was i to wash it off, ever.

but there was nothing else to do but walk and as i did tears were streaming down my face because soon all would be nothing. the world seemed so small before and now it was as if civilization was nothing and all i ever wanted to do for the rest of my life was breathe in and out and touch and feel and taste and look around. i wanted to lie on the grass every day and walk barefoot on the pavement but there wasn't anymore everyday.

tonight would be the last tonight.

and i never knew how much i would miss it until i never woke up

so go on and cry baby, cry. tell me how it feels to be alive.