Everyone in Society Needs Their Own Bubble

I'm going to die.
You're going to die.
It's a fact. Sorry to be the one to deliver the bad news like I've just accepted the position as the Grim Reaper's new secretary. But it's true. It won't be today. Hopefully it won't be tomorrow or anytime in the near future. It's still inevitable. So what has us so scared to just enjoy our lives? At the end of a long day when we're sitting down to watch the news there's another report of something out there that's going to get us if we're not careful. What are the people in the squawking box telling us to fear this week? And what are we going to do about it?

First it was the bird flu. Now it's the H1N1 virus, how kind of them to change the name so we wouldn't be scared to eat pork. You can't just be scared of the virus itself because now there's a shortage of the vaccine that have been developed for the flu season that is looming in the very near future. Add to that this threat: If we don't reform health care (or nationalize health care- whichever you prefer) then it's going to collapse and then there won't be anybody to take care of you when you have the H1N1 virus anyways. Health Care will soon be in the junk heap with the banks, the job market, car companies, and the housing market. You might as well just throw the whole economy in that junk heap.

Not only that, but we also have to be scared of the things we shouldn't be scared of. Don't drink the water! If it's bottled water it hasn't been regulated and you might just be drinking tap water. But we can't drink tap water either- too many people are flushing their pills down the toilet and into our water supply. Essentially we're consuming someone else's Ambien/Vicodin/Viagra with every glass of water. You can't eat that! Whatever it is, it's going to make you fat and it will have to be taxed accordingly. If it's not going to make you fat, then it's not organic enough and it's been sprayed with too many pesticides. If that's not the problem, then it's going to give you E. Coli or Salmonella. There's too much lead paint on your child's toys. Don't let your kids go outside or they'll be abducted. Don't play with lawn darts, you're going to lose an eye. North Korea or some other country is going to hit us with a nuclear missile. We're going to run out of oil! Flesh eating parasites will settle into your lungs if you breathe too much fresh air. Acid rain will melt the skin off your bones. The sun will give you cancer, global warming will melt Alaska, then vampires and zombies will be there in 2012 to facilitate the end of the world.

Exhausting, isn't it? And this is information given to you everyday by those people in the television.

I've found a solution though. Everyone in society needs their own bubble. The invention and sale of the bubbles will cure the economy faster than legalizing marijuana would. There would be people needed to make these human gerbil balls, creating jobs across the land. There, economy mostly solved! There would be no need for cars anymore, you'd be able to get anywhere you would need to in your bubble. Besides, the bubble wouldn't fit very well in one of those hybrid smart cars anyways. No need for cars means a reduced demand for oil- solved! Your kids could go outside and play again. It's going to be harder to kidnap a kid in a bubble, especially if the kidnapper is also in a bubble. People in bubbles would get sick and injured less, reducing the cost of health care and the need for pills. With less pills, there's going to be less flushed into our water supply. No need for health care reform and our water will be safe to drink again! Salmonella or E. Coli won't be spread as easily since we won't have direct contact with food. Rejoice because cookie dough, lettuce, and peanuts will be safe to eat again... as long as it doesn't make you fat. There would be no spread of the H1N1 virus anymore, or any other virus for that matter. The bubble will come with added protection against toys that are supposed to be bad for your children, acid rain, and I would think that it'd be impossible for a zombie to chew through a bubble. Hell, there won't even be zombies- can't become one if you're in a bubble! Now, every one in a bubble won't solve every problem. 2012 will come anyways (and mostly likely just pass like any other year) and we would still have a chance of a nuclear attack. But at least the bubble would eliminate 85% of our fears.

Or... weird thought... we could just live our own lives as healthy and happy as possible without having fear constantly shoved down our throats. We're smart people built for survival. We don't need someone telling us to be scared all the time. We don't need a bubble to stay in until we die. Here's a secret... we're going to die anyways whether or not we fear every single thing the television tells us to. Why not enjoy life while we can?