Explaining Casual Drinking Habits to Your Children

In school, on TV, and in church and community programs, kids are given lots of heavy warnings about the evils of alcohol. These strong warnings are meant to counteract the positive messages about alcohol they might see in other places, and to hopefully keep them from developing drinking habits at young ages. But school age children take things very literally. If your youngster sees you drinking an occasional beer or glass of wine, he might become nervous, and fear the worst. The sight of an adult drinking may balloon in his mind into visions of serious alcoholics, people who have become very ill from lifetimes of heavy drinking, people who have gotten alcohol poisoning, etc.

Its important to educate children about the dangers of alcohol, but it is also good to help them have realistic views of it. Here are some ways you can answer children's questions about your drinking, and alcohol in general.

Your child asks, "Why do grownups like to drink alcohol?"

You can say, "Sometimes grownups just enjoy the taste of drinks with alcohol. Also, drinking a little bit of alcohol can help grownups relax their minds and bodies, and enjoy themselves."

Your child asks, "Why can grownups drink, and kids can't?"
You can say, "Kids' bodies and minds are still growing. When kids drink alcohol before they're fully grown, they can become very sick or even die. Or, it could cause their bodies and minds to stop growing in the right ways. People should wait until they're in their twenties to start drinking, because that's when their minds and bodies are finished developing."

Your child asks, "Are you an alcoholic?"

You can say, "No. Some people drink because they want to stop feeling things and stop thinking about their problems. When people get so used to not feeling things and not thinking about their problems, they want to drink more and more. They stop being able to handle life without alcohol. Other people are able to only drink a little bit, and are able to drink responsibly."

Your child asks, "What does it mean to drink responsibly?"

You can say, "Never drink so much that you cannot take care of yourself, or take care of other people or things that are dependent on you. Sometimes, if people drink too much, their minds slow down so much that they are not able to make good choices."

Your child asks, "What does it feel like to be drunk?"

You can say, "Its different for different people. Sometimes it just makes people sleepy. Sometimes it makes them feel very happy and energetic. Sometimes it makes them feel sad or angry. Sometimes it makes them feel a little bit dizzy."

Your child asks, "When will I be allowed to start drinking?"

You can say, Twenty-one is the legal drinking age. I expect you to wait until you're twenty-one to drink. First of all, because that is the law, and second of all, because that is the safest age to start drinking."

Kids don't need to be frightened of alcohol, in order to avoid underage drinking. Knowing the facts, and your expectations, as well as being appropriately supervise, should be efficient.

On the other hand, if your child is genuinely worried about your drinking habits, you may want to think about how your drinking is effecting him. Does he see you acting irresponsibly after drinking? Does he ever have to take care of you when he's been drinking? Is he afraid of you when you've been drinking? If so, you may want to look into the idea of quitting, or at least cutting down on, your own alcohol consumption.