Facing Persecution Successfully & What You Need to Know

While visiting with my mother, a news bulletin flashed across the screen, informing the public about a popular actress' latest exploits as if a worldwide disaster had occurred, forcing commentaries from all over the globe-online, on television and in every place I frequented later that day. Reminded of an incident, memories flooded back at the scandalous methods others have used to discredit one's reputation and livelihood.

Whether gossipers belong to a certain religious group, employment firm or in your own neighborhood, the damage gossip can cause has not changed throughout the centuries. Repeated information, studies have proved, changes every time it is repeated. What is said to one person in confidence becomes distorted to the point of being unrecognizable when repeated to another.

One example-from my own experience-occurred more than ten years ago. Having had a weekly study session with a friend and one or two others for more than three years, I was hesitant to cancel the session due to illness, eager to see my friends and have something else to occupy my mind other than my health. Since my kitchen held the family table and chairs as well as the china cabinet, a desk, an easy chair and the associated accessories of a large room in an elderly 1920's two-bedroom home, whose additional rooms led off of the kitchen, including the master bedroom, I rose from my unmade bed, forced into resting from my efforts at keeping my home presentable and proceeded to get dressed for my visitors.

Since I had been diagnosed with pneumonia two weeks earlier, I was having a difficult time recovering as my sons were in grammar school and had little to no help with daily chores. However, as presenting a good impression always remained uppermost in my mind, I made certain the kitchen was clean, the floor swept and mopped, and the clutter put away-as much as I was able. Only a few items that needed ironing lay out in full view, the ties my sons wore on meeting nights, two shirts and a dress. Having discovered a few of my father's old ties in the closet, I had taken out a few, laid them across the desk, trying to decide which ones might look best for each of my sons.

When my company arrived, I went about making a fresh pot of coffee while they settled themselves at the table, never imagining that the state of my bed or that the collection of men's ties on the desk would ever become a subject for debate. However much I noticed pointed glances, it did not occur that I might ever need to explain their presence.

Less than a week later, I ended up in the emergency room at the hospital with pleurisy, a painful inflammation of the lining of the lungs that manifests with pain in the sides upon exertion, making the simple act of breathing difficult. Forced into cancelling my weekly sessions so that I could concentrate on getting well-doctor's orders-it took an additional three weeks before I was well enough to resume a regular routine.

Suddenly, the people in my small group of friends were no longer speaking to me. Figuring they must be having a bad day, I thought nothing more about it. Months passed fairly uneventfully until one day a woman approached me and said, "How dare you show your face in public! Have you no shame?"

Startled, I turned and walked away, having no desire to become embroiled in a public showdown-especially in the middle of God's house--when I had no idea what brought on that accusation. Later, in private, I asked her to clarify herself. When she refused, changed the subject and excluded me, pointedly turning away from me, saying, "This is a private conversation. You are not invited to attend." Hurt and confused, I turned away.

One year later, I found out, by accident, that the woman who I had considered my closest friend and confidante, had told someone that I was having an affair, because she saw "his" tie in my kitchen and my unmade bed, jumping to a wrong conclusion about a matter that only existed in her imagination.

If the matter had ended when I first asked what the problem was that made one so upset, the situation would not have gotten blown out of proportion, gossiped about to countless others who also repeated the information, I would still be living there, happily married and content. But no, the situation worsened until I was forced to defend my reputation.

The man in question-having allowed the matter to go to his head-began chasing me all over town in his car, following me until I was forced to contact the police in order to protect myself. In the end, he was rebuked by the congregation, his wife left him, and he ended up alone-hopefully at an abandoned weather station in Greenland.

In retrospect, I can almost see how the seeds of gossip grew. The words I spoke became seeds, falling upon the fertile ground of her imagination, watered by seeing me speak kindly to him and his wife, voicing praise and commendation when the situation warranted, and voicing my admiration. Those seeds found a root, growing out of control once the gossipy rumors left her mouth, possibly intending to cast doubt upon my credibility so that others would be forewarned to keep their distance.

One's reputation is all anyone truly possesses. To have someone close spread scandalous gossip with the intent of ruining one's reputation, without concrete evidence of the facts, is deserving of being sued within an inch of their lives because it is the only recompense that will ever be forthcoming. In this age of envy and hate for someone having what you want, resenting that person for possessing what you do not have will never be just cause for creating needless heartache. In fact, the term that most closely describes this type of behavior is known as persecution.

Persecution can occur in many forms. Whether it be insults, harassment, or injury that is deliberately inflicted due to one's status, race, religion or beliefs, the purpose is to destroy. Why? Have you not heard about the Holocaust, the persecution of the Jews during World War II? When an object of hatred is destroyed, it cannot be replicated. Thus, the act of persecution seeks to wipe out what is most feared so that growth will not take place.

When one seeks to ruin another's reputation by whatever means is at hand, the objective is to erase that person from one's life and the life of those around him. Successfully achieving that aim is the reason for the action of the gossipmonger. He may not consciously be aware of how his actions are received, but subconsciously the objective remains the same.

During times of hardship, when one is unable to perform what has been promised, the resulting scandal of being labeled a liar, discredited as a result of events unforeseen, is a grave injustice, and we see it every day when our friends and families are forced into bankruptcy. Degraded by society, forced into renting the cheapest home available, and unable to care for oneself, many are forced into enduring ridicule, another method persecutors use to stamp out what is unwanted in humanity.

Most of us know at least one person, well-known in the community for having made use of his unique tactical strategy to become rich in material possessions, sacrificing honor, loyalty and truth for the sake of the dollar. Can you honestly look at this person with admiration for his integrity? In what has he shown integrity? What do you suppose his employees think of him for cheating them out of their rightful pay, lying to them repeatedly with empty promises of tomorrow, and then tomorrow they are met with more lies?

In actuality, by his very actions, he is showing contempt, ridiculing his laborers for toil he dare not join, telling others how stupid they must be for putting up with his antics. Yet, the laborer continues his work, knowing he has no choice. He fulfills his promises to his family by providing for them, illustrating the value of possessing some form of integrity by his very effort to endure without complaint.

Most of us have endured some form of persecution without understanding that there is a more important issue at stake than just our lives, hurtfully despairing that you have been singled out of hundreds, perhaps thousands, over something you may not even be aware of possessing a certain quality of faith that is the possession of no other. Why me? Why is it always me?

Dare to be different, and you risk your life. Refuse to fight for what you believe, give in to the national standard of conformity, and lose your integrity. What choice does that leave the individual determined to stand firm, convinced his integrity is worth more than his life?

If you were faced with death in the next few minutes, consider yourself in all seriousness. What good have you accomplished with your presence in life? In the next five minutes, make a list of what you would do to make restitution, who needs to be forgiven, what needs to be done to make your journey complete?