Faking Sick: How to Trick Your Parents to Let You Miss School

It is important to KNOW beforehand that you will be absent on a certain day. Only a master, such as myself would be able to wake up on Tuesday and decide "I'm not going to school today."

You're obviously a beginner, so take it slow. If you want to be absent on Tuesday then you need to warn yourself on Monday.

Monday, when you have the thought in your head that you will be absent you need to put your plan into action. You need to create an excuse for being absent.

I suggest that you stay in your room the whole night. If you hang out in the living room you will OBVIOUSLY make a mistake, or ruin your plan. If you are in your parents presence they will get tired of just looking at you. Stay in your room all night being really quiet.

You only come out of your room twice. The first time you come out of your room do not say anything about feeling ill. Wait at least an hour. Come back out and MENTION that you are feeling bad. Don't say "mom, I'm not feeling well." Don't be too obvious. Say something like "aww my head" in the middle of a sentence. Or choose not to eat dinner because your stomach hurts.

Afterwards, mention that you are going to bed early. Then actually go to bed.

If your room is close to your parents make sure you wake up in the middle of the night to cough pretty loud. If you're room isn't close then I suggest going to the bathroom closest to you're parents' room. Leave the door open and act like you're trying to make yourself puke. Bathrooms echo, so you're parents are almost guaranteed to work. If you're parents have a restroom in their room use that one, and when you are going back to your room, whether they look awake or not, say "I'm sorry, someone was in the other bathroom." Then slowly go back to your room.

Now it is morning. Whenever you see your parents in the morning mention how nothing important is happening at school. Do this casually.

This is the most important step because it shows EFFORT. Get dressed, drag your book bag in front of your parents.

Now that you're dressed and have laid the foundation for a wonderful absence, here comes the real acting. Make sure this happens in front of your parents or your tattle tale little brother. Lay your head on something and act short of breath. If you can manage a few tears then you're gravy. Act all noble as if you WANT to go to school, but remember to mention how horrible you feel.

Your parents will think that you're feeling bad, and it is their parental job to take care of you. They will also think this is not an act because of the night before AND you really want to go to school because you are dressed. They will pity you and offer you to stay home.

***If you're parents are a little hard in the head and don't think to let you stay home, wait about 10 minutes before it is time to leave for school, and tell that you are sick and can't go to school. Tell how you were up all night trying to sleep but just felt so bad.

This method is great I've used it since I was little. There has never been a school year where I didn't miss at least a month's worth of school at least.