Fall TV: Bionic Woman is Good

"Bionic Woman" is sure to be a hit, especially among the male, Gen-Y crowd, but leaves older viewers nostalgic for the old Lindsay Wagner series.

"Bionic Woman", which premiered on NBC at 9pm this past Wednesday, is high on action but low on character. Except for some basic similarities in plot, it bears little relation to the 1970s series "The Bionic Woman". "Bionic Woman" is darker, and the players are laconic. The dropping of the article in the title befits the show's terse dialogue.

The darkness shouldn't be surprising. The post-911 world is more dangerous and cynical than the era that produced "Welcome Back Kotter" and "Three's Company." Unlike the sunnier 1970s series, "Bionic Woman" takes place either at night or in overcast daylight.

The leading ladies reflect the atmospheric difference. Wagner's Jaime Sommers was blonde. The current Jaime, played by British actress Michelle Ryan, has black hair and skin that looks like it's never seen the sun. Wagner's character was an outdoors type: a tennis pro and recreational skydiver; Ryan's Jaime is a bartender. Wagner's Jaime was warm, upbeat, and sometimes funny; Ryan's is sullen and angry.

Wagner's character was someone with whom I'd want to have a cup of coffee; Ryan's is merely someone with whom I can empathize. With a nod to current culture, the new Jaime is saddled with a bratty teen sister who doesn't want to live with her father.

In fitting with the times, the image of government as good guy gives way to a rather nefarious federal agency bent on controlling Jaime for its own spooky purposes. The friendly Oscar Goldman is replaced by stoic Jonas Bledsoe, played by Miguel Ferrer.

Although the plot is easy to follow, it contains deliberately inserted blanks that make it murky. The old Rudy Wells character is subsumed by Ryan's boyfriend, a brilliant bionics surgeon named Will Anthros (Chris Bowers) who works for the gray-hat Feds. When Jaime announces that she's pregnant (inconceivable for Wagner), Will proposes, and she accepts. But it's a marriage that's not to be. The would-be couple's car is demolished by a semi driven by Sarah Corvus (Katee Sackoff), an out-of-control cyborg being hunted by Ferrer and Company.

While Anthros only suffers minor injuries after being thrown clear, Jaime is left mangled and dying. Desperate to save his sweetheart, Anthros, against Company policy, replaces Jaime's damaged parts with super-cybernetic ones that rapidly heal her entire body. Terrified by the limbs and organs implanted without her consent, Jaime is understandably ticked off.

Sackoff, for her part, is a superb and sexy villainess, so good that she almost steals the show. That may be why she's introduced late in the episode. Sarah Corvus is a psychopath with a conscience--if such a thing is possible. Early on, she's cornered after committing some sort of carnage and shot dead by her Fed boyfriend. Somehow she's revived through the actions of a Lex Luthor-like character who eventually escapes from a maximum-security prison. At one point, Corvus has her ex-boyfriend in her gun sights but can't bring herself to kill him.

Corvus has a new boyfriend, another villain, who is seen stitching up his arm. "Tell me you love me, " Corvus implores, before lunging for him. As with the violence and some language, the makeout scenes in "Bionic Woman" are too graphic for young children, and the series is appropriately rated TV-14.

The episode concludes with Corvus and Jaime having a huge, special effects-laden battle on rooftops. Both women are far more fit and curvaceous than was Wagner. If you like your ladies strong and gorgeous, you'll love "Bionic Woman."

The cheesy slow-motion sequences and "na-na-na-na-na-na-na" sounds used in Wagner's day are replaced with stylish, computer-enhanced martial arts choreography. It is unclear how Jaime suddenly becomes a cyborg version of Lucy Liu. Presumably her new high-tech parts--an arm, two legs, an eye, and an ear--provide automatic instruction.

If Ryan's Jaime is less likable than Wagner's, Corvus is somewhat sympathetic in her malevolence. Even though she nearly kills Jaime and Anthros with a high-powered rifle, she has a sister-like respect, even affection, for her "good" counterpart. I put "good" in quotes because relativism reigns in "Bionic Woman". Both Jaime and Corvus didn't ask for their powers, although Corvus is now insanely intoxicated with hers.

A little comic relief comes during the climactic fight scene, when Corvus calls "time out" to smoke a cigarette and then calls "time in", giving Jaime fair warning that combat is resuming. After nearly getting bested by Corvus, heroine Sommers equally batters her opponent.

"How am I doing now?" asks Jaime.

"Not bad at all," admiringly replies Corvus before leaping off the roof in Supergirl fashion.

In a script almost devoid of snappy dialogue, Ferrer has the best line. When Jaime asks him who he is, Ferrer nonchalantly replies, "You have 50 million dollars of my property in you. I guess you could say that I'm your landlord."

When Ferrer threatens her, Ryan icily intones, "I know what I'm capable of now. You send your guys after me, and they'll be piling up in body bags." Whoa!

As a fast-paced action thriller, "Bionic Woman" is excellent, but its characters are contrived and not fully human. With regards to the two cybernetic females, that is true both physically and emotionally. And that speaks volumes about the present era, where tech is in, and genuine communication is too often wanting.