Fear After We Dry Out

I drank beer because of enormous fear
This went on for many a year.
Lust followed by disgust was eating my soul
Along with waking up, faced down, in the toilet bowl.
Running scared while in denial everyday
This is what my life had become, what else can I say?
Living daily with millions of people around
Feeling so isolated every time I went downtown.
Wanting desperately to change deep within my heart
But not having a clue or a friend to show me where to start.
Shame and guilt were the misery on which my life was built.
Near the end, I was reduced to tears from under my quilt.
Weakness, not willpower ruled me at night.
I traveled far away to keep my habits out of sight.
My bottom was a horrible review of wreckage and those I had torn
But now I see it as God guiding me back to the reason I'd been born.
Now sober I do things to insure that I'll stay...
The way God wanted me when He rescued me that day.
I remain always grateful and never forget to say...
"I'll do it your way, Lord" whenever I pray.

To Sum Things Up
You must begin to saturate your days with messages, people and situations of all kind which are positive, enlightening and which will lure you in a different direction than you are going. Our fears are a result of being exposed to a world what we have never had to deal with without the aid of alcohol. Fear is created by excessive drinking and thinking. For me, the first year of sobriety was ruled by doubt and dominated by fears, but I remained with positive people. I read positive books. I worked out and tried to get plenty of sleep. After the cycle of going through that first year was complete, I was able to gain some confidence along with perspective regarding my new life as a sober person.

I was once a hopeless drunk and a lost soul. I was going nowhere. I drank daily to bury my fears and to help me forget the shame that was a constant ache in my conscious thoughts. When that inevitable and inescapable bottom hit I knew that I had to make the most of it. It was an opportunity from God, a chance to escape hell. It was sink or swim. To swim meant to sober up and face my fears. To sink simply meant DIE! It did not take me that long to realize once I had a bit of sobriety behind me that I only feared the success that had been trying to get out of me for many years.

Please make a commitment to yourself to join me as we both fight our fears as we find success. I will pray that we all choose to swim.