Feminism: How Feminists Screwed Me
Treat Me like a Woman and an Equal
This article is a rebuttal to an Associated Content article called "The Sexism of Chivalry: Feminists Tired of Special Treatment," by Allison. I took exception when I read about her radical feminist views on women. She made points that when men treat women with deference, when they use manners, when they put the female's needs before their own, men are actually treating women like children. They are being sexist.
The problem with feminism today is that their focus has completely changed from being equal and having the freedom of choice to being better than men. Feminism used to mean giving women the freedom of choice; instead, it's all about women who exhibit massive amounts of penis envy. Feminists don't want to be equal to men; feminists want to be the same or better than men. Equal does not mean identical.
Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but I often wonder what it would be like to live in the age of chivalry. Put feminism aside and travel back in time, retain the rights we women have now, yet allow the niceties back into our world. What's wrong with a man holding the door open? I think it's thoughtful, not that he thinks I'm weak and incapable of opening the door. Help me scoot in my chair because it's polite, not because I'm a child. Feminists have ruined polite society.
I'm 29 years old, but my dream is to someday have a 1950s household. I would love to stay at home, raise children, cook, clean, and have a drink ready for my husband when he walked through the door. In return, he would love me, provide for me and the children, and respect me as a wife, a mother, and a woman.
I would take his last name, out of respect for him, not because I'm subservient to him because he's a man. A friend once told me, "Even if you keep your last name, isn't that your father's name? Isn't your father a man?" Even though the feminist movement gave us the freedom of choice, this particular choice is frowned upon by today's feminists. It is virtually impossible to create this sort of family life and still maintain respect from today's feminist.
As a single mother, I have to do it all. I cook, clean, pay bills, take out the trash, work full time, and raise my two young children alone. I'm not whining, because it was my choice to divorce their father. But it's hard, and most days I wish I had someone to take care of me.
These days, the feminist movement has made it so I'm expected to know it all. I'm supposed to know how to mechanically maintain my vehicle and how to make flowers out of frosting. I have to know how to change a fuse and how to get grass stains out of pants. Are men expected to know how to intertwine ribbons into a braid of hair? Are they frowned upon when they don't know the difference between a crochet hook and a knitting needle? No, of course not. Today's feminist movement expects today's woman to be twice the person a man is. How is that equal and fair?
Published by Heather K. Adams
Heather K. Adams is an award-winning journalist with the North Dakota Newspaper Association. While she can write on many topics, she specializes in personalized national and state news reports, music, and pa... View profile
- Hair Loss Facts for Men and WomenThe causes for hair loss in both men and women are a similar mix of genetics and the effects of hormones, although the balding pattern varies between the sexes. There are some medically approved treatments that can help.
Purses Reveal Power Issues in Relationships Between Men and WomenAre you that kind of woman who goes and gets her purse to give a partner something? Do you defend that bag at all costs? The way a woman handles her purse may show literally an...
March Madness Basketball: Different Rules for Men and WomenA tongue and cheek look at the differences between men and women's basketball as set forth in the NCAA Basketball Rules. Differences include, ball size and weight, headband colo...- Men and Women Light Bulb JokesMen have a different way of approaching life - even even when it comes to changing light bulbs...
Charlie Sheen and Brooke Mueller Threesomes with Men and Women -Their Wo...Charlie Sheen and Brooke Mueller's world is filled with sex, drugs, and violence. New reports have the couple participating in many threesomes with both men and women.
- The Differences Between Men and Women
- From Oppression to Expression: Textiles' Ability to Provide a Gateway for a Truly...
- The Liberated Mommy: Confessions of a Feminist Mother
- What Is Feminist Theory?
- Adrienne Rich Helps Further Feminist Rights
- Feminism and Feminist Theory
- Feminist Reading of the Poem Rape by Adrienne Rich
- Treating me like a woman doesn't make me a child.
- Keep your last name or take your husband's - either way, it's still a man's name.
- Today's feminist movement expects today's woman to be twice the person a man is.
15 Comments
Post a CommentExcellent points!
This is a great piece.
I agree with this...I'm old fashioned too. Some of my aunts had amazing long=term marriages and I want that too...
ya hit on a point i think without addressing it ... i think in the 50's house hold .. there was an even greater equality than today .. the mother was generally the disciplinarian , ran the meals , activities , the house and kept it in order , the fathers role was to earn money , provide safe home and the ability to keep it up and the bills and meals paid for , when needed address family issues and advise ... its perfect math
Good article, and I'm glad to hear expressed views on a topic. I would take issue with the statement that feminism use to be about choice and now its about gender politics. Feminism has always had a rainbow of people in it that has spanned the two points. And while I can understand the pressure you feel to not be who it is that makes you happy, I would not lay all the blame on feminist for expecting women to do more than men. Many feminist would love for men to step in, even the militant "penis envy" feminist. When any power shift occurs (which you and I both benefit from) to level the field, the one who wields the power being even often does not come along. Both women and men have to hold the expectation that men need to be kicking in wherever its appropriate and necessary. Thats when that hypocrisy will fade.
Thanks for sharing your opinion. Even in disagreement the more people talk about it the more we all can understand the nuances of social interaction.
I like it when a man opens doors for me and stands before I do at the dinner table and holds doors open... maybe I am old fashioned, but then again, when he opens the car door to let me in first, I lean over and unlock it for him. Chores around the house are 50/50, but not the same 50/50. I may wash the dishes or the clothes, but he fixes the broken window and the leaky toilet. I'm a strong, independent businesswoman, but perhaps in my personal life I'm what many would call 'old fashioned'. I and Ryan call it respect. Plus, I love when he says, "Yes, ma'am." (shrug) In response to Allison, I guess it should be, 'To each their own..." if she doesn't like it, fine, but don't condemn those who choose it and don't bash those who try to provide it. Sad to watch a man open a door for a lady and have her then not act like a lady toward him for doing so. Manners. Polite society. Ah, well.
Interesting points. I think the modern man is confused about how to act towards women. Is he going to be scolded for opening a door for a woman? Some women expect it, some don't. Where's the balance? Hmm...
LOL theBarefoot :) Thanks for that - it made my morning. Thank you all for your wonderful comments!
I too will offer a textual standing ovulation.
There is no way to provide you with a standing ovation in text. If I could - I surely would.