Fifteen Gift Ideas for Us Gals Over Fifty

Having just dusted off the candles on my 56th birthday cake, metaphorically speaking, of course, it is frankly quite exciting to know that the REAL gift giving season is just around the corner! Let's address the needs - and more importantly, the wants - of those of us women who have seen the half-century mark come and go. We're quite a vibrant demographic, you know, and it's not as tough to shop for us as you might think!

1. Cash! We love, love, love cash! We can spend it where ever, however, we want, with no strings attached. Some of us will spend it on jewelry (Tiffany!), some on clothing (Chanel! Chico's!), others will buy a mountain bike or a new yoga mat. But bliss is cash, folks, and don't be embarrassed or ashamed to give it to us in hearty numbers. We like cash, we're not insulted by it. Viva la greenback!

2. Gift cards. Yes, we love gift cards, too; they're second only to cash! But think carefully before you choose them. Those of us who ferret out the buys at Chico's sale rack may not appreciate a gift card to Dick's Sporting Goods. KNOW the woman to whom you're giving the gift card; know her exact and specific tastes. Otherwise, you will have spent probably good money for nothing if it is something she won't use, and you would have been better off giving her the cash in the first place! Be creative: you might want to pick up gift cards or certificates from Lowe's, Home Depot, Sears, J.C. Penney, your local higher end department stores, Linens'NThings, Bed, Bath and (way) Beyond, the recipient's favorite hair salon (always a big favorite) or spa, Borders, Barnes & Noble, even the local grocery stores if you honestly believe that would not insult but really be a plesant surprise for the card's recipient.

3. A trial or six month membership to a gym or 'spa' gym, like Curves or Butterfly Lives. (Yes, that is the actual name of a pseudo Curves 'gym' franchise - do I really want to live the life of a butterfly? I think not.) Sorry, I digress, but my point is an important one. I happen to be 70% physically disabled due to an accident several years ago. Physical therapy is hard for me. But in a controlled environment, I would certainly welcome and use a short-term gym membership. There I could train under the guidance of someone who knows what they're doing and more importantly, what I can do to improve my health. There are lots of ladies our age who are in superb physical condition; they might very much like to try a new gym or a new form of exercise. Then there are those of us who sadly don't get enough exercise. This would very much motivate us to give it a try: why would we want to waste such a nice gift? Remember, know the physical conditioning mindset of the lady for whom you're buying a gym/spa membership before you whip out your credit card for this gift.

4. A true spa experience! I can't think of too many women who wouldn't love to be pampered at a salon or day spa for even only an hour or a day. This to us is the height of blissful sinfulness! We wouldn't go out and buy this for ourselves, folks. You can give us a certificate or gift card either in a dollar amount or for specific services: a facial, a manicure, a pedicure, a hair cut and style, a massage...be creative with this one! Many woman, myself included, color their hair; a prepaid gift card for unspecified use at a salon or spa is a wonderful, wonderful idea. For many of us, it's a necessity, not a luxury anymore!

5. Jewelry! For many of us, especially at this point in our lives, jewelry is a true luxury. We won't buy it for ourselves because we have too many other pressing financial concerns (such as how long will Social Security last, and will we live to see any of its benefits?) The nice thing about giving jewelry to a woman our age is that not only can she wear it herself, it's something that she can consider an heirloom, to be passed along to the next generation. It's good to give a gift that keeps on giving....but if you do pick out jewelry, try to get something decent: real silver, real gold, real gem stones. Don't waste your money on costume jewelry; we've most likely been buying that for ourselves for years now, in an effort to save money. Look for a tasteful necklace, a bangle bracelet, an exquisite broach, a stunning pair of earrings. Shop the jewelry stores, the mall stores, and cerainly on line. Do a little homework first: learn about how to tell a real Tiffany necklace and earrings from a fake one. If the price seems too cheap to be true, then it's most likely a knockoff. Figure out first what to buy, then do your homework and research. A piece of jewelry is a gift that lives on forever, and something that will warm the heart of its recipient with your thoughtfulness.

6. A new handbag! If your intended gift recipient is like my own mom and myself, we carry the same damned bag, changing only for summer and winter. Gets a little boring, frankly! But like everything else, know the woman's taste for whom you're buying. Does she carry small bags, or does she love shoulderbags? Would she like an authentic, large Longchamps tote? Or would she swoon over an original (new or vintage) Chanel bag? Some of us buy purses a lot, but most of us stick to the one bag for two seasons theory. There are some beautiful handbag styles out this year: croc, leather, even vinyl and fabric. Check out those made by some of the more popular designers: Chanel, Kate Spade (but be careful here; a certain youtfhfulness flows in her designs!), Dior, Balenciaga, Chloe, Birkin, Mulberry, Ralph Lauren, Via Spaga, Dooney & Bourke. Check out discount stores like T.J. Maxx, Loehmanns, Marshalls for styles and really good prices. These shops carry a very large variety of handbags at great prices. But again, just in case it's literally not her style or she had her eyes on the brown Via Spaga rather than the black - make sure to include a gift return certificate or the original sales slip if she'd like to exchange it for another style or color of bag.

7. Lingerie and intimates, seventh floor! Yes, we do love our cozy downtime, readers. There's nothing better than snuggling up at night in a long, soft, luxurious bathrobe, especially if it's one that is 'too pretty to buy it for ourselves'. Look for warmth, ease of getting it on, and quality here. There's a particular brand called Miss Elaine which makes wonderful, wonderful bathrobes in jewel tones, with front zippers so that they're not only very pretty and well made, they're also very easy to slip on and off. And don't forget a matching warm set of pajamas or nightgown. (Actually, they don't have to match, and you don't have to buy both. But no matter what you buy, make sure that it's well constructed and attractive.) There are a variety of styles and fabrics from which to choose. I'd suggest you start browsing in the higher-end department stores (Macy's, Lord & Taylor, Nordstrom) to see what styles they currently have and also to see what sales and bargains are available, too. You can also check out the Loehmann's of the world as well, but your selection will be significantly more limited, in terms of both sizes and selections. And don't forget to throw in a pair of warm, snuggly bedroom slippers with your gift. Slippers can cost as little as $5 (but let's no go there) or up to $40, depending upon brand, quality, and fabric. It's always a thoughtful gesture to add matching slippers with a robe, nightgown or pajamas; it makes the gift more special! Look for bathrobes that zip up rather than tie; they're much warmer and practical as well.

8. And let's not forget perfume! This may seem like a simple, almost silly, gift to buy. Here again, though, is the caveat: this is not something that most of us older gals actually go out and buy for ourselves. It is highly considered to be a luxury item. If you're concerned or confused about what brand to get, check out the lady in question's dressing room or table: what brand does she currently use now? If she's used it before, chances are good to great that she'll enjoy it again in the future. Consider getting her bath talc, perfumed soaps, shower and body washes, by the same brand designer, as well. One thing to keep in mind, especially if you're really not sure what kind of perfume or scents she would like, is this: most of us do not want to smell like we've been spritzed by the 'perfume lady' at the local department store. We want something lighter in fragrance (i.e., eau de toilette rather than 'parfum'), and we will NOT be thrilled to find a wrapped bottle of Brittany Spear's' 'Curous' with our name on it. Think more classic lines: Chanel, Dior, Givency, Ralph Lauren, and take a second look at Vera Wang's perfumes: they're soft, suble and streamlined, like her clothing line. If you're somewhat leery about buying perfume or eau de toilette, then purchase her favorite designer's scented bath soaps or drawer liners or padded clothes hangers. She can use these items to give just a whiff of her favorite fragrance to many of her clothing items.

9. Magazine subscriptions! Again, this is something that many of us gals wouldn't buy for ourselves, or actually even think about it. There's a huge variety of magazines to choose from, with so many different interests, hobbies, lifestyles, etc. Think a yoga, fitness, health, nutrition or specific sports magazine for the lady who's interested in the benign benefits of yoga, golf, tennis, swimming, eating right, exercising, and maintaining a healthy life style. For the lady who lives for the gossip, choose "People", "Us Weekly" or some of the other lighter reading materials. There are magazines and periodicals for those interested in decorating, home improvement, hair and skin care, lifestyles of the rich, famous and not-quite-as-famous as they'd like to be celebrities, pet owners magazines galore (dogs, cats, birds, even exotic pets), travel and leisure time magazines, gourmet cooking (Bon Appetit!), homemade crafters, geographic magazines (most large cities have their own magazines: New York, Philadelphia, Chicago, Baltimore, Los Angeles). And don't forget my own personal favorite, the New Yorker. For a change of pace, you can even consider paying for a year's subscription to the lady's hometown or local newspaper as well.

10. An online or television shopping network gift card! I made this a separate gift card category for several reasons. A lot of ladies over fifty STILL do not have access to the internet, or chose not to use it. (I am referring here to my much loved mother and her circle of friends. Instead, they just love, love, love shopping via television, QVC in particular. My mom has, ove the years, purchased a multitude of gifts for family and friends from the television shopping network. She, and her friends, have also forked over some pretty hefty bucks on (well-deserved) gifts and items for themselves as well. What a nice surprise if you give a lady who shops like this a gift card/certificate that she can use for her shopping?! Bear in mind that the reason a lot of woman in their fifties and older shop via television is that they can't get out to the stores on a regular basis, this due to the fact that they are physically unable to do so or can no longer drive. For those women who do shop online rather than via television, Ebay offers gift certificates/cards for its users. If you're looking for a gift for a lady who loves Ebay, this would make an awesome and certainly unexpected gift for them! Denominatins for both television and online shopping vary, so you can select a specific gift amount. And remember, it's not just Ebay that has great online shopping: think Amazon, Bluefly, or any of the online womens' retail sites such as Bloomingdales, Nordstroms, etc. They'll have a ball using their 'gift' - I know that I would!

11. The always appreciated edible gift! Let's expand this beyond the Fruit of the Month Club here, folks. (To be honest, a lot of people really do like the Fruit of the Month! It gives them fresh, superior quality goodies and something to look forward to every month.) There's a franchise called Incredibly Edible Delights that offers fruit baskets arranged in nifty 'bouquets' that a woman on a somewhat restricted diet would love to receive. And don't forget that old standby, Omaha Steaks. They offer an amazing selection of food gift packages or monthly gifts, including steaks, burgers, entrees, prime rib, hot dogs, chops and all sorts of side dishes and yummy desserts. Check out their selection of large and not-so-large onetime gift packages as a single gift, or consider their monthly selections as well. For the lady with the sweet tooth (yes, we all have them, we're just in a constant state of denial), consider the gift of chocolate. For my late, departed mother-in-law, every Christmas for years and years we always included among her holiday gifts a very large, beautifully wrapped selection of Godiva chocolates. (One year we decided not to purchase the chocolates for some insane reason, and she was sorely disappointed. We never forgot again after that!) Google online to see what other kinds of creative edible gifts fit your recipients' fancy: chocolates, steaks, candies, fruit, jams and jellies...the possibilities are endless.

12. Okay, I'm going way out on a limb here, but think about the gift of a ... pet! My mother (I smile as I type these words!) has lived alone for over twenty years now, and is quite the independent gal. (She's also seen 80 years come and go.) One of the best presents we ever bought for her was a parakeet. We actually ended up buying four of them for her over the years, as each one gradually met the Lord Parakeet up in the sky. She was very, very fond of a particular pale blue colored bird, incidentally. Not only did we buy her the parakeet(s), we also purchased a new cage, toys, a care booklet and food for her (a lot of food, just in case she would ever run out.) And also included was a bird cage cover, so that her little friend could go night-night at the proper time. Over the yeas, my mom taught the birds how to sing upon cue and respond to certain vocal intonations. It kept her company, it was a little buddy for her each and every day. If you're thinking about buying a gift for an older lady, please, please consider her lifestyle. If she's active, always on the go and prefers not to hang around the house, don't get her a pet. If she travels frequently, don't get her a pet. But if she's somewhat housebound and still able to give minimum care to a pet, then please consider buying her a little friend. Buying someone a dog is a big investment for anyone; if you're replacing a lost or deceased pet, this is a wonderful thing, but try to ferret out (ha!) what her true feelings about the pet's loss really are. Would she love to have another dog that reminds her of Buster, or would she prefer to leave that stage of her life behind her? Also, a dog takes up an awful lot of time: it must not only be fed and watered, it will also require some amount, but always at least some amount, of time and energy to train it, walk it, and play with it on a regular basis. And for heaven's sakes, don't go the puppy route unless the woman has hinted broadly about having a new puppy! Being the owner of a dog is like being a parent all over again; make sure that she has the spirit, the physical capability, and the emotional and financial resources to care for it properly. A cat is a much less intense pet to have, and cats are, for the most part, wonderful companions who require little physical effort. But not all of us are cat lovers, sadly. Again, don't pick out a kitten: it's like bringing a toddler into her home. Cats can offer serene companionship at very little financial and physical cost to their owners. if you do decide to go the pet route, please consider visiting your local animal shelter or Humane Society first. They have so many wonderful pets literally dying to be adopted, and you'll be doing a very, very good thing by 'purchasing' your gift pet from them. The staff can also give you somewhat of a history about the dog's physical condition and temperment as well.

13. Flowers! Yes, this may sound trite, but it's true: women love flowers. They love them whether they're planting them in their garden, overseeing a landscape project for a customer, plucking them for accent pieces in a Manhattan loft or a Kansas farm house: we love flowers. FTD and the larger flower companies offer a huge variety of holiday floral arrangements in all price ranges, and it's a plus that they will ship them directly to the recipient on the date that you choose. Be sure, however, to use a reputable floral service. FTD used only approved and FTD certified florists, so your arrangement won't be coming from a run of the mill floral shop - choose carefully! Another twist on this gift idea would be to combine a gardening gift: seeds, books covering the type of flowers the recipient loves or already has planted in her garden, a book on decorating with flowers, on making floral arrangements, plus all of the necessary tools and equipment. You also might want to consider a gift certificate class enrollment in a store like Joanne Fabrics or the Rag Shop, which offers classes on floral arranging, making wreaths, etc. Here's one idea that I particularly love: a terrarium! I received one as a holiday gift years ago, and just loved it! It was simple for which to care (a huge bonus!) and lasted seemingly forever. Ask your florist about long-lasting floral gifts instead of table or centerpiece arrangements. They may offer terrariums, a cactus arrangement, or something new on the market that's guaranteed to last a long time after December. For my last birthday, my aunt (who is also my closest friend as she's only 2 years older) gave me a gorgeous, booming, huge springy floral arrangement, perfect for an October birthday - talk about cheerful! The most striking thing was that the arrangement was based into a very large (14 - 16" tall) martini glass, with pink-tinted water keeping the flowers fresh - it was an awesome gift that I'll never, ever forget for its uniqueness and its symbolism of the two of us frequently sharing a martini or two when we're together.

And while on the subject of flowers, don't forget other 'natural' gifts that might be pleasing. Perhaps the lady in question would love a medium sized to large indoor tree; perhaps the gift of a live tree would brighten up her garden or landscaping plan as well. Perhaps the gift of a gazebo, porch awning, large flower planters, deck chairs of loungers might be just the ticket! Floral or garden items that last will last forever in her memory and heart...

14. And don't forget my personal favorite, the gift of travel! A lot of women over fifty are finally able to travel much more freely than in the past. It is, finally, now more than socially acceptable for women to travel alone. Their children are grown and hopefully on their own, or at least away at college or university. Their significant others are now much more understanding and/or tolerable about letting us travel on our own. (My husband, who hates to travel himself because he spent so many years doing so on business, is more than happy to send me, sometimes with my girls, to a destination of our choice. On the added plus side, I've come home to newly repainted kitchens, baths and bedrooms while away, and also to spruced up gardens as well. I just can't lose here, folks!) Sorry, I digress. My own mother has been a widow for over twenty years, and even though her health isn't the best, she is absolutely thrilled to get away from the home in which she was born. The gift of travel can be a wonderful, wonderful gift - but be absolutely certain that the woman in question is both up to it physically and would honestly enjoy it. Some ideas include get away spa visits for an extended weekend (mud baths! massages! facials! pedicures!), or trips that your local travel agent or online service offer as well. Many of these are short hops: a few days in Vegas, trips to an East Coast casino (including Atlantic City), three to five days in Jamaica, Bermuda, Mexico...the possibilities are endless. But remember to include the entire cost of the trip in your gift: no giving of a gift voucher only to an international location WITHOUT including air fare and spending money! Strongly consider an all-inclusive trip as your gift. That way, with air fare included, your giftee doesn't have to spend her own money on anything but souvenirs and memorabilia. If possible, try to schedule the trip for the colder months, but many women, including myself, have had some awesome trips during June, July and August (low season) as well. One thing I would STRONGLY recommend: don't just purchase ONE trip package, but please, please, include TWO people in the entire travel gift package. I know of several women who have received very nice travel gifts, but hesitated - or ended up not using them at all - because the travel was only for herself. Having a companion's paid accommodations and air fare will make all the difference in the world, trust me. It's just not that much fun traveling for a middle aged or so woman by herself. If you have to cut down on the destination because buying for two would cost too much - look for a more inexpensive vacation site or don't bother to give the gift at all. And be certain to buy travel insurance!! Only God knows if something will happen prior to or during the trip - it's a must! In my own case, my husband would give me a pretty card with a note saying that this card is 'good' for one trip for two (or three, depending how many daughters or friends I want to take with me) to a certain location. I then do/did the booking myself, either online or through an agent. Wonderful! (I also made calendars over the many years that I traveled actively, choosing one photo for each month of the year. I've kept these travel calendars as wonderful souvenirs for the soul.)

15. Perhaps the nicest gift of all is the gift of yourself! As those of us who hit fifty feet to the ground, we found that we had a renewed sense of freedom and vitality; we also began to see certain restrictions - aches, pains, twinges, arthritis, lessening sight or hearing - pop up, seeming out of nowhere. And as we raced towards sixty, things may have become even harder. For the ladies enjoying their seventies, eighties and upward, we suddently found ourselves with way too many restrictions on how we'd like to live those 'golden' years. Some of these are certainly and sadly physical; others are financial and emotional. The bottom line is: we often need help. You may live down the street or 3,000 miles away from the woman to whom you're giving a gift of yourself; if you think it through carefully and with love, it can make a world of difference. Some ideas to consider are paying for a full season of snow ploughing and removal; paying for a pool closing, opening and maintenance; paying for new siding or windows or flooring in their homes; paying for a month's worth of extracurricular activities at a nursing home or assisted care center; paying for a month/six months/a year's worth of house cleaning; paying for a professional dog walker, or offering to pay a year's worth of veterinary bills for her beloved pet (and throw in a few months' worth of food as well. Older pet owners may often either forget or can't afford to pay for pet food. Sometimes, they can't get out of their homes or apartments to do so.) Another idea is to buy one or two rolls of postage stamps, plus a box of blank every day, all occasion greeting cards or notes. Pay to have a generation or two's worth of family memories (old movies, tapes, etc.) put into DVD format, and make sure that she has a DVD player with which to view them! Be creative: does she need a new dining room set to replace the one that you used when you were five? Go out with her, buy a new one, and have it delivered. The same holds true for a favorite easy or reading chair; maybe she needs a new, higher intensity lamp to go with it. If her medical/dental coverage isn't that great, give her a check or cash to pay for much-needed services or co-pays. Whatever creative idea that you come up with, I'd suggest that you carefully check it out. (Giving of yourself in this way might be the very best, most thoughtful present she's ever received - go for it!) Once you've decided, be sure to make the presentation of the gift as special as the gift itself. Buy a beautiful card, and write inside something loving and which gives a hint - just a hint - of what's to come. Purchase a beautiful gift box or bag - and make sure it's a classy, elegant box or bag, with all the trimmings - and either write out, type out on your computer or include the special 'gift' that you've chosen for her. This piece of paper consists the gift of yourself: go all out for it with fancy paper, type, etc. Whatever you decide, I wish you the great satisfaction of knowing that the best gift you can give is yourself and your love...

Happy holidays to all!