Fighting through the U.S. Immigration Process: A Firsthand Survivor's Tale

When you find the love of your life, there is nothing that can separate you: or so you think. In the case of my husband and I, our biggest obstacle was the U.S. government. The entire year we spent battling paperwork and funds for us to legally be married and live in the United States feels like a blur now, but was an nightmare at the time.

My husband Kevin and I met online in 2005. We quickly fell in love and battled a long distance relationship between Lancaster, Pennsylvania and Winnipeg, Manitoba. Phone calls, emails, trips after months-long time periods: we did it all to be together. In April 2006, while I was living in Missoula, Montana, my husband proposed to me and that began our journey towards immigrating him to the United States so we could be married.

We submitted our initial paperwork for a K-1 Fiance visa. This would allow Kevin to come into the States to be married, and at that time, he could apply for a two year permanent residency and work permit. Along with the visa application, we had to submit proof of relationship. This included pictures, emails, receipts, plane ticket stubs, anything you can imagine to prove you are an "in love" couple. My priority mail package to U.S. Immigration was over two inches thick, and I still did not know if the evidence was adequate enough to prove we were in love and prepared to be married.

The letters that came in the following weeks were general receipts letting us know the paperwork had been received, and then that the paperwork was transferred to another processing facility. I was so frustrated at our paperwork being forward to yet another facility and the processing dates pushed back. There was absolutely no way for us to plan a wedding not knowing when our visa would be granted.

By September, we still had no word and no idea of how much longer the process would take for our application to be approved. I had moved back home to Pennsylvania and I was daily going through the emotional roller coaster of the unknown. What would I do if they were to reject our application? Could we afford the appealing process? By this point, we had spent several hundred dollars in fees for paperwork and consulting meetings with a lawyer; and still no answer.

Delays after delays in what was supposed to initially be a 60-90 day waiting period, and finally a decision came via mail in late November, right around Thanksgiving. It was by far the best Thanksgiving I have ever had. We were approved for the K-1 application! The next step was for Kevin to receive paperwork notifying him of his interview with the embassy in Vancouver. Two weeks later, his notification came, and he had to be in Vancouver in two weeks. He quickly booked the time off and put the expensive plane ticket on the credit card. Another expense we had no idea how we were going to pay off.

The entire day of the interview I was fretfully waiting to hear from him as to how it went. The next day the decision was reached: he was approved. We were so excited. I could finally begin planning our wedding for February. I went busy into bride mode booking appointments, and putting together the details for our wedding.

Kevin arrived in Pennsylvania the last week of January 2007, only a week before our wedding. We had hoped that border crossing would give him a work visa, as we had heard through other sources that it was possible. However, the information was incorrect, and they no longer gave work visas at the border crossing. Yet another disappointment.

We enjoyed our cold wedding day, and the week following, honeymooning in northern Pennsylvania and Buffalo, NY. It was a great week to escape reality and the trials that were ahead. Once we came home, we had no idea how we were going to find money to submit the paperwork for permanent residency and his work visa. We had only 60 days to do so, and the price was expensive.

Just before the 60 day time period was over, we scrounged up enough money to send in the paperwork and waited. It was May. By late July, Kevin had been granted his working papers and permanent residency soon followed. We breathed a sigh of relief. Despite the paperwork errors, and frustrations with the call center at U.S. immigration, it was over.

Now, we are approaching the two year mark when we need to reapply for a new, ten year, permanent residency card for my husband. This time, however, it will require us to go to the Philadelphia embassy to sit in separate interviews for them to determine if we are truly in love to be married. Ridiculous. I believe I will be renting the movie 'Green Card' very soon and making flash cards to quiz each other.

The process of love and being together should not be about money and paperwork. The United States has gone from being completely lax on immigration, to a completely overbearing father. I have had many people say to me, "I am sure it makes you so angry that so many people are living here illegally and you had to go through so much for your husband to come into this country." I have had much time to think about these types of comments and I have finally come to a conclusion. I cannot blame the illegal immigrants.

If my husband were from a different country, and had absolutely no money, and I had come from different circumstances with no money, he would not be here legally. The fact is, immigration to the United States is extremely expensive, and for anyone coming from a less than grand situation, there is no way for them to afford to be here in this country. I cannot blame them for coming into this country illegally to seek a better life for themselves and their family.

To come to this country legally, the U.S. government does everything it can to help you fail. Between the transfers, paperwork mess-ups, outrageous fees, and general frustration at lack of information that is available, they set immigrants up for failure. The call centers, to get questions answered, are a joke, and only leave you more frustrated and confused. The embassies where you go to for information, and are required to have an appointment just to ask one question, are rude and disrespectful. It seems that every step one must take towards legal immigration into this country is meant to be a pitfall.

So to those people who ask me the above comment, no, it doesn't make me angry at all. I cannot blame them for wanting a better life and refusing to go through the hoopla that the U.S. immigration services requires to enter legally into this country. Now, a year and a half after marriage, my husband and I are still trying to find funds just to register his car legally in this state, yet another $200 fee. The fees, the paperwork, and the frustration is never-ending, but must be done to be with the ones you love.

We chose to go through the immigration process legally, because we were able to. So many people, coming from third world countries especially, are not able to do so. Even more frustrating, no one is there to help them without cost. The customer service provided by the U.S. immigration department is worthless when it comes to finding out the correct, and most updated information regarding immigration. More than once it has led us astray in the correct procedures of submitting paperwork.

A change is needed to ensure that illegal immigrants are not coming into our country because they have no other options. Changes need to be made to assist these people in coming into our country legally by reducing the fees and the amount and timeliness of paperwork required to enter this country. Without these changes, illegal immigrants will keep entering our country this way because they have no choice. As Americans, and based on the freedoms our forefathers gave us, we need to push for better, more efficient immigration processing that gives all immigrants the option to enter this country.

I have written my congressman, and to no avail. My four page letter describing in exact detail every frustrating step of our immigration process was only answered by some general letter telling us what he planned to do to fund the wall between the United States and Mexican borders. Had he read my letter, he would have known that he is not listening to his constituents. Spending the billions of dollars building a wall will not help this process. Instead, put that money towards better customer service centers that promotes the correct information getting to the general public. Spend that money towards consolidating the massive paperwork trail that is currently required. Spend that money to reduce the enormous fees that need to be paid just to submit the paperwork despite approval or denial.

I agree with most people: the immigration process isn't working. But it's not because illegals are "stealing" our jobs. In fact, illegals are making this country billions of dollars a year by providing cheap labor. So instead, let's work together and solve this problem so that immigrants all have the opportunity to come into this country legally. Let us not worry about welfare, and healthcare, and all those things that many say immigrants will use to their full advantage. The fact is, natural born citizens of this country are taking full advantage of the privileges of living in this country without giving anything back. Let us bring people into this country who will contribute to this society socially and economically.

Many want to come to this country for the opportunity to live a full life without persecution; to live in a country that will not kill them based on their religion and beliefs. That is what our country was founded upon, and nothing should change that principle. Reform is needed in the immigration department so that all people have the opportunity to live a life of liberty and to pursue happiness without abandon.