Film Review: Sleepaway Camp

A typical 80s slasher with an unexpected twist would be a good start in trying to summarize Sleepaway Camp. If you can put up with an hour-long ennui, 20 minutes of enjoyment awaits. It is that hour-long ennui that concerns me.

If you have heard about Sleepaway Camp or read another review about it before casting your eyes on this one, you already know that what makes this movie remarkable is the ending. As of April 23, 2008, that ending is available for the viewing at You Tube. So you have two options at hand:

1) You can take a short cut, watch the ending and see the one and only scene that makes this movie a cult slasher, then move on with your life,
2) You go and put up with the entire movie for that scene in the name of God-knows-what for some 80 minutes. I did this and still go "what the" when I think about it but my God-knows-what was me being a slasher fan so...

One thing is for certain. You're gonna see lots of kinky shorts in this movie. If you watch the uncut version, you'll even have naked boys running on a pier, going skinny dipping. To top that, there's a Head of Counsellors with bulging muscles and always wearing what? Skimpy shorts of course! Let's not forget older boys in shirts cut right under the armpits or below the bellybutton. Though generating a few laughs at first, this *cough*gay*cough* tightness in 80s male fashion gets rather sickening after some point but those who are interested in that area will be much pleased. As for female skin, mmm you know, just a scene with a saucy pubescent with too much hair wearing a black bikini you pedophiliac! Other than that, it is constant tight shorts and some fregging tight shorts more.

You see the first part is so slow-paced that you end up finding other means of entertainment for yourself. I finished my evening yoga during a baseball scene for instance. This neverending scene, which, as far as the cast recalls, took an entire day to shoot, never ends! It lasts a nice 3 minutes of running around and randomly shouting cocky insults at each other. Its only importance lies in the misery that the punchline, "We'll get'em back" is uttered for the first time. After that point, everyone throws random "we'll get'em back"s around. I'm kidding. The line is repeated only 3 times (the first two in consecutive scenes). But for me, you hear it once, it passes. You hear it twice, it stays. You hear it thrice, it stinks.

The plot is simple but don't believe that this is a lousy Friday the 13th follower no matter what you hear. Not every movie that takes place in a summer camp with a killer in a slaughtering spree has to resemble Friday the 13th... Right? Erm, this one is about two cousins; one being a very shy girl and the other a very protective boy. These two actually live together in the same house because the girl's family was killed in an accident. She then came to her aunt's house and boy what an aunt this woman is! If her uber superficial head tilt and thoughtful finger gesture are not enough, she speaks in loud, slow syllables that would turn any sweet little house puppy into Milo the Dog wearing the Mask. Hahahaha! Got that? Milo the dog... The Mask... wearing and.. oh well. Thankfully, her role is not long but what little of it makes this movie a horror movie so she's given credit.

The cousins go to a summer camp and since the girl is very introvert, she stays mute for the first thirty something minutes. She only stares no matter what happens around her. She stares at those who keep nagging at her, she stares at those who try to befriend her, she stares at those who shake her, she stares at those who try to rape her... The girl can't get enough of staring and staring which gets annoying after a while. Some think it's scary, me thinks it's annoying.

Just when does Angela, that's the staring girl, speak for the first time, you think? When a boy gets to show some interest in her. Now isn't she cheap? Still, we are made to believe she is innocent and naive. Innocent my...

I think the movie starts out as an 80s teen movie and turns into a slasher before winding up as a psychological thriller. It is like a tasteless soup that you drink since you are in some chic restaurant and ordered it because you read somewhere that it was good. Just at the last sip, a sharp aroma fills your mouth but you gulp it down too soon and the soup is over.

Finally, those who pick at Angela starts dying one by one. You think it's Angela and you're right. No you're wrong. Yes you're right but not for real. In order for that sentence to make some sense, you have to see the infamous finale. You'll be haunted by that expression for some time.

Sleepover Camp is a long short story. Having narrated well, it would have made an excellent short story. However, this is a movie and it lasts more than an hour so watch it if you so like but don't think you haven't been warned.