Finding the Time to Be Me

In the dizzy whirl that describes my daily routine, it's entirely possible to get completely carried away while attending to essential tasks that cannot wait, and so much more that calls for attention on all fronts.

The result? I sometimes forget that there's much more to me than the description of my roles as mother, wife and worker suggests - I am me - and to keep my identity from being swamped by the deluge of activity, I've identified a strategy - a plan that will give me the time and energy to do what must be done, with enough left over to indulge my own aspirations as an individual.

To pack all I want into a day that doesn't seem long enough, I've decided to allocate different days for the various tasks that consume all my time and attention - with little to show for the person that I am.

Waking up early gives me the opportunity to get ready, and put in some of the activity I have in mind for myself - time to indulge my own needs before I attend to anyone else. Hackneyed though the saying is, charity does indeed begin at home - and bearing that in mind has worked wonders for me.

Keeping track of my activities through a journal has also helped to give me a sense of direction and perspective. I do this for my son and myself, and have found that my jottings through critical or significant events is a solace through tough times on the one hand, and takes me back to the high points in my life on the other.

This is also the time that when I can give expression to my creative urges - for the book I am writing, which may never make it to the stands, but will be an important milestone for me and speak volumes about my role as a parent and as an individual. Writing this book has filled me with the exhilaration that comes with accomplishing an objective.

I am brimming with ideas, and am spurred on by dreams of making a grand success of my endeavor. At the same time, I need to attend to the humdrum routine of daily chores. I've decided that the best way to handle this is to attend to different tasks on different days through the week.

The most extensive of these tasks is that of keeping the house clean and here's how I decided to go about it - dusting on Mondays; bathroom cleaning on Tuesdays; cleaning of the kitchen and hallway on Wednesdays; vacuuming on Thursdays; paperwork and filing on Fridays; fridge cleaning on Saturdays. I decided to keep Sundays free for rest and recreation.

On the subject of cleaning, the fact is that most of the rooms in the house do have varying degrees of dirt most of the time. My solution is to clean up as and when required - one thorough cleaning session each week will keep the house in reasonable order and keep me more relaxed.

I've also realized that whereas I once preferred to do everything with either the television set on or music playing constantly, gradually, I realized the value of having time to reflect - time to explore ideas for my various projects. It is during this time that I can also dwell on the question of self improvement and how I can go about making it a reality.

And then of course, I'd like to have time for hobbies such as reading, which I am so keen on, but cannot find the time for. My husband tries to do his bit by picking up books for me. I do enjoy relaxing with a book whenever I can, which also makes me feel I am doing something worthwhile - but don't get to indulge this hobby very often.

I also consider it important to spend time with my family, and being able to do things for them makes me feel closer to them. It's doing little things to help when my husband is in a hurry, for instance, that make me feel good about myself. It's that feeling that I value so much - instead of becoming disgruntled and constantly dissatisfied with the way things are.

Lastly, I do believe it's so important to have the time to dream, because dreams can be a launching pad for ambitions - and when those ambitions are fulfilled, I feel I have a reason to hope for a future that will be full of the promise of more prosperous times to come...