First Person: I was Falsely Accused of Being a Child Molester

While it was never said directly, I was falsely accused of being a child molester. Not a single person who reads my articles would expect that I am a child molester and they'd be correct that I'm not. It is always a terrible thing to be accused of being a child molester. My situation was worse because instead of it being by just one person who I could avoid, it was done by an entire "worship" community.

What Was the Background to This?

My sister has Asperger's. Nothing is her fault. I tried to talk to the parents of the two children that were in Sunday School. They were coming of age to be considered "youth" by many, though I've learned that "youth" should not be given a certain age if children, preteens, or teens are ready.

Anyway, we had come back to Lake Charles, LA after Hurricane Rita hit. The church building for this "worship" community had been ruined by the hurricane. Because of this, we were worshiping in the building of a different worship community.

It was after our service and I tried to talk to the parents. The father did not listen to me. I tried to talk to the mother about my sister's diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome. The more I tried to talk, the more the mother dismissed me by saying things like, "Oh, I know all about that" and "Oh, I worked in a facility where people had mental disabilities."

No matter how much I tried to explain the diagnose to them, they did not listen.

I did not get angry at them. However, it was frustrating as I needed them to listen since I my sister was teaching the children Sunday School at times. It was easy for her because they liked to read and they had a story format for their Sunday School lessons.

However, the parents never listened to me.

How Did it Start?

It was only a normal Sunday (although, I could say that a normal Sunday was not great with the way others treated me '" but that's another story). Anyway, we were worshiping in the renovated church building. My sister was not feeling good, so she excused herself to the building next to the sanctuary called the Fellowship Hall. It is where we held Sunday School and where we had refreshments after the worship service. I had also set up a Youth area in one section.

One of the effects of Asperger's is stimming, or in other words, a repetitive motion comforting to the person. They take different forms such as flapping hands, rocking with hands on the side, and rocking with hands between the legs.

My family knew she was not feeling good and when she does not feel good, she tends to rock with her hands between her legs. When she does this, she does not realize that she does it. However, she can still respond to people near her and people who talk to her.

The mother of the children took her son to the bathroom which is in the Fellowship Hall. As they left the bathroom to go back to the sanctuary, he saw Briana sitting on one of the couches in the Youth area I had made.

The son told her, "Hi, Briana." She responded, "Hi, 'son's name."

It was only about six months later that we learned why people had started treating us worse than they had been treating us before the mother saw Briana.

How Did I Learn of This?

We were sent an e-mail by the "Head of Education" who was not in the state for half the year. She could not actually be the head of education, but she insisted that she was because of some council "constitution." (They could break the rules for the treasurer, but not for the head of education, even though I was always interesting in Faith Education and this person was not.)

The e-mail says that Briana needs to resign her position of Sunday School teacher because of her behavior. We do not know what this means as she had done everything I had asked and asked me for help when she needed it.

We write back and we get the mother's original e-mail. It accuses Briana of masturbating while sitting on the couch and not washing her hands. It goes on to accuse my Mama and Daddy of not teaching us correctly and teaching us that we need to wash our hands and do this type of activity in private.

Now, my Daddy had lots of medical issues and my Mama is not exactly healthy, either. I am thankful that they never kicked me out of the house, but I was also always helping. My family needed me (and my mom and my sister still need me).

The mother never respected that I stayed at home to help my family. It took my Mama, my sister, and me to lift my Daddy when he got weak and needed help. We never had the money for him to have a personal nurse.

Anyway, the mother wrote of how she did not want me to "touch her children." She made it obvious that what she was writing was that I would sexually abuse her children. She spread rumors around the "worship community," too.

Instead of first talking to my sister, me, or my parents after seeing the stimming behavior, she gossiped to the organist. They then went to talk to the vice president of the council. This caused gossip in the council and then caused gossip in the entire church.

The entire church judged me as somebody that would masturbate and as a child molester.

As I said, there was a time I didn't know what was happening. During this time, they would not eat any food I brought to share. Nobody would volunteer for Youth Ministry or Sunday School events. I did not know why until receiving the e-mail.

How Did This End?

The truth is that it never did end. That "worship community" had me come in for a meeting with the "pastor" (who I cannot regard as a pastor because he did not act like one and deliberate lied to me to get me there) in which he made me hold back tears and blamed me for things that I could not control.

To get me to come to this meeting, he told me that he wanted to talk about Sunday School and Youth Ministry. He had another person there, too. He acted like I was a child instead of an adult.

This happened when my Daddy was alive. I told my Daddy what happened and he told me to not meet with him until the two of us could go together because this was basically a form of abuse.

The "pastor" called when my Daddy was out of town. I told the "pastor" that I could not meet with him, but he continued to press on about meeting. I had to hang up the phone because the "pastor" would not stop.

The council then said my Daddy and I needed to meet with them. They said it would be a meeting, but it was a trial. They had it set up like my Daddy and I were in court so the of us faced the whole council. We were presented with sheets that said they were for the "correction of my behavior."

I had done nothing wrong by quoting the Bible, showing Bible verses, and trying to talk to parents about the situation at hand. However, they yelled at me.

They said that by using e-mail, I was wrong. However, we were informed of these "decisions" by e-mail, too. Why is writing an incorrect way to communicate, especially when it is not rude.

So, when my Daddy saw this, he tore the papers and threw them because it made him angry.

Nothing was settled because the council insisted that I had done things wrong (and did not appreciate any of my hard work [or my Daddy's hard work] that we had done for the "worship community" since 1987 when we moved to Lake Charles, LA) and the mother and father of the two children who were youth continued to insist they were correct.

The family ended up moving, but while they still lived in Lake Charles, it seemed that they were spreading rumors about the family.

While I am still officially a "member" of that "worship community" only because my name is on their books, I do not go there. I attend a different worship community where I am accepted. I agree with the basic theology, although I do not agree with all their ideas.