First Time Dads: A Guide to Guiding Yourself Through Early Fatherhood

After nearly three years of marriage I have finally joined the new dad's club. My wife is only a few months along and we have talked babyville for sometime now. But until you actually hear those three loving and memorable words, "honey we're pregnant", that's all it is: Talk. Then it just hits you.

"I'm going to be a Dad!"

But now what? What do you do after you have spread the good news and are unable to wipe the smile off your face? In my case it came down to two things: watching and learning.

After growing up the youngest of eleven children one would think I would be totally equipped to have a baby. I have twenty-some-odd nieces and nephews for crying out loud! I ought to be ready for babies. But like so many other things in life, until you actually experience it you will never quite know what to expect. The "it" in this case is fatherhood. And while I anticpate the arrival of my first bambino, I know that life lessons, family memories, support from friends and loved ones (and a lot of praying) will provide that foundation for fatherhood.

But even this isn't enough for new dads. We must go back to school, hit the books, and begin preparing the life of a proud poppa.

Days after my wife and I remained giddy from the excitement of expecting, I started doing a little research on being a first time dad. This just in: there seems to be a misconceived notion that men are on the outside looking inward during your wife's pregnancy. But that myth stops here. It comes down to knowing as much of what is going with the pregnancy as your wife does (if not more). That means doing the research: books, helpful websites, blogs, or what ever you need to educate yourself on something that will last the rest of your life, is the perfect way to get involved early and often in being a new dad. As one book delicately puts it, "The husband is pregnant too".

Wow! They never covered that one in school.

Here are a couple of books, websites (complete with magazine selections), and even a blog to lend insight on new dad essentials to your little one, your wife, and you:

"She's Having A Baby-and I'm Having a Breakdown", by James Douglas Barron

This is the perfect book to welcome first time fathers. It offers an honest and comical approach to "what every man needs to know-and do-when the women he loves is pregnant". Barron's baby book is by a man for a man (nice!), something he says, "offers suggestions on how to act, what I should do, one that would help me understand my wife's emotional and physical state" all while helping us new dads also adjust to life with a little one. Written to detail what to expect one trimester at a time, "She's Having A Baby" makes for an entertaining and informative way to read, laugh, and repeat.

"The Expectant Father-Facts, Tips and Advice for Dads-To-Be" by Armin A. Brott and Jennifer Ash

Some may think, "If you have read on baby book, you have read them all." Obviously those people are unaware of Armin A. Brott's collection on the early stages of being a dad. The first in a series, (also see Brott's "The New Father: A Guide To The First Year" and "The New Father: A Guide To The Toddler Years") these helpful hints explain everything a new dad needs to know through the next nine months. With chapters titled, "Where and How", "Money", and "Work and Family", Brott highlights what expecting dad's should expect month by month and how to plan for it. Hey, it's not Star Wars, but Brott's "New Father" trilogy is a must have-"a helpful roadmap through the often bewildering country of fatherhood", as one impressed review says.

www.fatherhood.about.com

This is the perfect website for first time dads. About.com always provides a wealth of information. And the "New Dad Resources" section is a true testament to that. Whether you are looking for baby basics on financial help, learning about adjusting to a new routine, pregnancy principles, and a calendar that tells you what daddy, baby, and mommy can expect week by week, this site has it all for us new dads including "10 Tips For New Dads." So here's a quick tip: Click on over, and get ready to learn about everything you wanted to know about becoming a fantastic fatherhood. You will be glad you did.

www.fathersdirect.com

This U.K national information site on fatherhood is a great tool for new dads around everywhere. The site believes in creating "a strong relationship between children and dads" around the world and offers support to those in the early years of fatherhood as well as young fathers. Make sure to click on the "publications" section for "Dad Magazine". This publication includes articles on managing finances, blending work and family, and how to build a solid fatherhood foundation.

www.babycenter.com

Okay, so sometimes us men have to take the backseat for a bit. Babycenter.com may be mostly for mommies, but they haven't forgotten about us either. Guys make sure to log on and click on "Pregnancy-Dads-To-Be". You can't go wrong here. Once you subscribe to the free newsletter (yes, you should be doing this) and free Babycenter magazine, your pertinent information will result in an online pregnancy chart. Every time you log on, the graph will explain in detail what week your pregnancy is in, and what is going on in there. And out here.

www.daddytypes.com

Today, it's all about the blog. There is now even one for us new dads. Daddytypes touches on everything from books, to general baby advice, what we need to know about newborns, stroller previews/reviews, and all the latest in baby and daddy (and mommy too) news. Hey, if you haven't found what you are looking for in new dad knowledge from the above websites and books, then this blog will surely bridge those baby gaps.