Five Key Ways to Have a Successful Marriage

Marriage is not always easy or fun. Your marriage can last forever with a bit of effort and perseverance. My husband and I have been married for 20 years. We have discovered a few key ways to maintain our marriage and our love for each other.

1. Make a commitment to each other. My husband and I decided before we ever were married that once children came into the picture that we would never divorce. We have had many difficult times through the years but our commitment to our marriage vows has kept us together. We learned that by committing fully to each other that no matter what issues arose we are capable of working them out together.

2. Find common ground with your spouse. My husband and I could not be more different from each other if we tried. He is quiet and reserved whereas I am more outgoing. My husband loves football. I had never watched a football game in my life before I was married. The first few years of our marriage I would sit with him and watch football games. He patiently explained football plays, calls and the rules of the game. I still don't love football. I am able to watch a game with him, understand what is happening, and spend time with him. I love books and my spouse is not a reader. He makes an effort to go to bookstores with me and find enjoyment in my love of finding a long sought after book. Learn to be okay with the fact that the things you take pleasure in and the things your spouse enjoys may not always be the same. Marriage will be stronger if you have outside interests from each other, yet learn to share the things that you love with each other.

3. Communicate daily with your spouse. Saying I love you and connecting emotionally with your spouse daily is a strong marriage booster. The words "I love you" are very powerful. We have learned through the years that the simple act of saying I love you to each other can have a calming effect and renews our commitment to each other. Every married couple argues. Remembering and declaring your love for each other is vital in keeping a marriage strong through the difficult times. Communication is the key to a healthy marriage. Learn to share with your spouse every day your activities and problems that may have may have arisen that day.

4. Do not let problems fester. Recognize that a healthy and happy marriage takes work. Problems in a marriage that are allowed to simmer and grow make resolution mush more difficult. Determine to talk out the issue immediately. Talking over what is bothering one another immediately shows your spouse that your marriage comes first. Do not hold a grudge. Resolve that once the argument is put to rest that the issue is not allowed to be brought back up or rehashed in the future. Let bygones be bygones by allowing your marriage look to the future instead of the past.

5. Become your spouses' best friend while still keeping your other friends. Share everything with your spouse. If your spouse shared something with you in confidence, sharing that secret with your friends would be a breach of trust. Trust is vital in a marriage. Nothing cracks at the very foundation of a marriage more than lack of trust with each other. You must always be able to trust each other and know that your secrets are safe within the confines of your marriage.