Five Things Not to Do when You're Alone on Valentine's Day

Red hearts, teddy bears, flowers and chocolates. Isn't Valentine's Day great? Well, not when you are alone. Especially not if you are recently alone due to a divorce or painful breakup. Matter of fact, Valentine's Day can be a major pain in the butt. Every time you turn on the TV, someone is talking about love, the stores are full of hearts and even at the movies, you're likely to find couples walking hand in hand through the foyer. What's a single girl to do?

First, just breathe. It's only a day. Twenty four hours. You can make it through without jumping off the nearest bridge. There are many things you can do to make the day go faster, but here are some things you definitely don't want to do on Valentine's Day.

1. Don't call your ex. He's an ex for a reason. It's easy to forget over time, why a relationship broke up, because we tend to forget the bad moments and remember only the sunshine and smiles. Remember, you left the relationship because it was too painful to stay. Or, if you were the one left behind, what would stop him from doing this to you all over again?

2. Don't drink. While a glass of wine might sweeten your evening, tossing back shot after shot will make nothing better and only makes you feel worse in the morning. Drinking in a social setting might be fun, but tomorrow, you'll be alone again and you'll be nursing a hangover to boot.

3. Don't watch romance movies. Love is idealized in those flicks and they never reflect reality. You'll just feel worse about yourself and your perceived failed relationships if you dwell on utopian concepts of love. Remember that relationships are hard work and the blending of two personalities into a somewhat harmonic union requires concessions on both sides. Romance movies always end before the difficulties start. But they will start without fail. Romantic love does not smooth waves, it creates them.

4. Don't go out to dinner alone. You will see lots of couples on Valentines Day. While many of them may not be happy, they will certainly appear so. Exposing yourself to the sight of them will only make you sad. Cook a good dinner for yourself instead. Try a new recipe. Get fancy! And don't skimp on ingredients. Spend as much on dinner as your date would pay at a nice restaurant. If you're not a good cook, order in or pick up something fancy on your way home from work. You're worth it.

5. Don't think only of yourself. There are others out there who are equally alone and may feel equally lonely. Put a call in to one of your single friends and see if she wants to hang out. If you don't have any single friends, see if you can help someone in need. If you do something for someone else, it may lift your spirits and create a new friendship in the process. Volunteer or reach out to someone in your community who has no friends or family. It may not seem like fun at first, but you never know, you might enjoy it. If you dwell only on your own problems, you'll likely feel gloomier than you have to, but if you do something to make someone else's life better, you'll carry home a warm glow of feeling needed.

Granted, Valentine's Day is a day for lovers, but that does not mean we single folks have to feel blue. It really is just one day. You are no more alone today than you were yesterday. And tomorrow is a new opportunity to meet new people and make connections. Just for one day, let things ride. Life is too short to fret over twenty-four hours!