1. Go for a brisk walk.
Over the years I've learned that brisk walks are good for two things - jumpstarting labor, and moving a kidney stone. Where kidney stones are concerned, walks work best when you're not already writhing in pain. The point of the walk is to hopefully dislodge a stone before it has time to block the kidney, or in my case (those of us with the genetic kidney disease, cystinuria), before it sucks up more cystine.
2. Have great sex.
Sex is another great way to relieve light to moderate kidney stone pain, as long as you don't have a ureteral stent in place, which my doctor says could lead to an infection. It can't be complacent sex either. Killer sex will bring about a surge of adrenaline that will help keep your mind off of the pain. It might also help dislodge the offending stone. If your complaint is straight kidney pain, sex isn't a good idea, because it will only jostle and further anger bruised or otherwise angry kidneys.
3. Play a musical instrument when kidney pain is at its worst.
Okay, not everyone plays a musical instrument, but I'm sure everyone has an enjoyable, engaging hobby they can partake in at home. For me, especially when playing along with music, playing an instrument causes an adrenaline rush that numbs my pain. Also, reading sheet music or playing by ear will keep your mind busy and off of the pain, so playing an instrument helps both the physical and psychological aspects of pain. Violin playing has an added bonus. While playing, I'm forced to sit in a perfect, ergonomically-correct position out of habit. That posture, plus the adrenaline rush helps temporally eliminate back pain too.
4. Take a long, hot bath.
I use hot baths to help reduce kidney pain as well. In fact, it can relieve kidney pain and stone pain almost as much as playing a musical instrument. Baths are especially helpful with relieving pain from bruised kidneys, like post-procedure. Luckily, most docs will say it's okay to bathe with a ureteral stent in place.
Just now, as I was writing this, it dawned on me that hot baths are also the very last method of severe pain relief I try before heading to the ER. The outcome of the bath always determines whether or not my pain is bad enough to be seen by the ER. If the pain lessons to the point where I can sleep, I wait it out. If not, I pack my bags. One last thing you can do is:
5. Apply for a state medical marijuana license.
What could be more natural than a pain killer that comes from the Earth instead of from the inside of a pharmaceutical company's laboratory? Indica strains of medical marijuana are great for instant pain relief and relaxation. Pain relief literally comes in seconds in the form of a slight vibration in the areas where the pain resides. I'm sure plenty of people out there still think of wasted lives and loser stoners when thinking of marijuana users, but I'm here to tell you, as someone who had only tried pot once in 33 years, medicinal marijuana works, and when used medicinally, it doesn't change your personality (or "sigh" morals.). What chronic kidney stone patient wouldn't want instant relief that doesn't leave that person useless and sick all day long? Another helpful aspect of marijuana is that many strains of marijuana increase thirst ten-fold, so you will find yourself drinking more water than usual, which is good for kidney health and passing stones.
If you don't like the idea of inhaling smoke, edibles, including brownies, cookies, suckers, and candy bars are available at most medical marijuana dispensaries. The only downside is that edibles take just as long to work as traditional pain pills. You can also choose to vaporize marijuana instead of smoking it. Vaporized THC hits slower than when smoked, but much faster than edibles. If you have the patience to use a vaporizer, your lungs will thank you.
Published by Alicia White
Alicia is a former air traffic controller who lived in Japan for several years. She's currently a freelance writer in California, and a full-time student majoring in digital media/graphic design. View profile
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