Five Wedding Mistakes to Avoid

Let me start this article by saying that I had a beautiful, wonderful wedding. It was indeed the happiest day of my life, and I have the pictures to prove it. Somewhere. Every bride, in looking back on her wedding, has a few things she would change or do differently: things that went wrong. Perhaps I can prevent a few moments of panic, several tears, and a bunch of temper tantrums by sharing my wedding regrets with you.

Mistake #1: Not Testing Out My Directions
Be sure to take a day to drive the directions you are sending out to your guests, just to be sure they are clear. I made the mistake of trusting the wedding venue when they gave me a set of directions and told me they worked. Not only did many of my guests get lost on the way, and end up being late, but I myself got lost and almost had a heart attack on the way to my own wedding.

Mistake #2: Not Taking Dance Lessons
If you do not want to look like a fool during your first dance, do yourself a favor, and sign up for some dance lessons. It does not have to be anything fancy, just a few steps to repeat to the music. Also, give yourself several weeks to practice. We fully intended to do the dance lessons, but ran out of time and had to cancel them. That Chicago song was the longest four minutes of my life.

Mistake #3: Not Planning My Music More Carefully
Whether you have a DJ or a band, be sure to go over the play list song by song. Be sure to run this list by anyone who matters. In my case, it was my grandmother, who was offended by some of the "disco." My band did a great job with what I had given them to work with, but if I had to do it again, I would plan the evening song by song. I gave them too long a list, and ended up hearing songs I only kind of liked, and not hearing some of my favorites.

Mistake #4: Not Having Our Photos Printed
I will say this: even though you really want to be frugal, have your photographs printed and assembled by the photographer. We decided to save money by buying just the disks. Since we are good with Photoshop, we thought we would fix and print them ourselves. Well, we have about ten disks and hundreds (maybe thousands) of photos. We are way too busy and lazy to go through them ourselves. A year later, I am about to call the photographer and have her do it after all. In the mean time, I have no wedding album to show my friends.

Mistake #5: Not Hiring a Wedding Planner
Planning your own wedding, with the help of your friends and family, seems at first glance like a perfectly rational possibility. You have a full year before the wedding, you are a control freak and want to do everything yourself. You are Martha Stewart incarnate. None of this matters. I am here to tell you right now, get a wedding planner. You will thank me.

For me, the idea of planning my own wedding was appealing for all of the above reasons, plus, I thought, I would save the large expense of paying someone to do what I could easily do. What I realized the day my bridesmaids started arriving in town is that although, yes, I am capable of doing the planning myself, there comes a moment when a bride just wants to relax and enjoy her wedding. You really cannot do this if you are the one running the thing. The morning of my wedding was wrought with panic, rushing, and checking on details. It should not be like this. This should be somebody else's job. The wedding planner should be the one freaking out, not you.