Flash Fiction: Susan

Jolynne M Hudnell

The doctor had left the comfortable room leaving Susan to her thoughts. Warm ambient glow reflected off the wood paneling, creating the perfect atmosphere for reflection.

As she waited for the doctor's return, Susan remembered what brought her here - the divorce. On their wedding night, Jeff had told her she'd always be in his heart. The day he left she thought her world had ended.

That changed when she met Dr. Allen. He helped her believe she could go on. Dr. Allen told her she just needed to find herself again.

As the box she brought the doctor lie open on his desk, Susan began to wonder why he walked out in such a hurry. Perhaps he was canceling his remaining appointments so he could spend the rest of the day with her.

The gift was exquisite, practically a piece of herself. She imagined Dr. Allen - Bob - would rush back in and sweep her in his arms once he sent the secretary home.

As the door burst open, Susan smiled and looked up expectantly. Her heart dropped as the peace officer began to speak, "You have the right to remain silent..."

Published by Jolynne M Hudnell

Jolynne is a part-time freelance writer and independently-published poet. Jolynne has knowledge and experience in a variety of topics. Jolynne enjoys singing and writing poetry. Her published work in...  View profile

7 Comments

Post a Comment
  • Freida Thomas8/28/2011

    One word sums this one up...Superb!

  • Rae Manning8/28/2011

    I also love the punch line at the end. I think that is what makes or breaks a flash fiction story. :)

  • Rae Manning8/28/2011

    That was AWESOME! I love flash fiction. I've wrote one that was 55 words but like yours better. Great job!

  • Laura Cone8/28/2011

    super

  • Dina Montgomery8/28/2011

    Love Love Love this... :o)

  • Don Rothra8/28/2011

    Talk about a flash fiction, the ending is so abrupt that it grabs you. Nice work.

  • Ji Park8/28/2011

    Ending is definitely heuristic...sequels?

Displaying Comments

To comment, please sign in to your Yahoo! account, or sign up for a new account.