Forever in Blue Jeans

Probably 99% of the population has probably worn jeans at least one time. For all we know, Queen Elizabeth might even secretly wear them behind high stone walls while indulging a fertilizer fetish for rose bushes. Of course this would have to occur in a no fly zone as well.

Presidents have worn them. Zoo keepers have worn them. Members of congress wear them more often than one may think. Babies in diapers and senior citizens in diapers have been spotted wearing denim pants. Perhaps even congressmen in diapers wear them, I am not sure.

Jeans have different connotations to different people They can represent a good pair of work pants that one does not mind getting dirty, or even an expensive status symbol. The Russians once dreamed of owning a pair of Levi jeans. Some even bought Chuck Norris Action Jeans (modeled by the master himself, they have a hidden gusset and "won't bind your legs").

Levi Strauss is undoubtedly the one to point an imaginary wagging forefinger at when your kid wants a pair of stone washed, ripped up jeans and needs a hundred bucks. He is probably most responsible for the popularity of jeans in general. Levi Strauss started by designing rugged pants during the California gold rush. And it caught on like wildfire. He cornered the capitalistic market for quite some time. Lee, Wrangler, and all the expensive designer labels like Ralph Lauren were not yet a thread in the needle for years, even decades to come.

You really have to wonder what Levi would have thought if he was alive today. His famous name brand pants were part of a 150,000 dollar superbowl prize package in 2003. They had diamond buttons and 18 K gold signature patches. This might be considered the pinnacle of Levi Strauss jeans. It is unclear if they were supposed to be washed in the gentle cycle with Woolite or just sent out to the neighborhood jewelry store. Either way, these pants were a far cry from the sturdy pants worn to pan gold.

A century or so later, if you do an online search for "jeans" you will have so many name brand choices you won't know which one to choose. Of course some of these brands of today are better known than others. Some will stretch, some will slim you while still others will give you a muffin top. And then there are the ones going out of style (thankfully), such as the raggedy bottom, worn half way down your ass, trip the wearer jeans. Some may make you look sleek like a cougar while others may make you look like your menopausal mother in elastic waist pull up jeans.

Even dogs wear jeans. There are plenty of blue denim doggie outfits available for those small, yappy, pocketbook types of dogs. It's understandable why a greyhound might wear a lined denim coat in the colder regions while taking a daily constitutional; greyhounds have little warmth from their short fur. If the United States stopped purchasing silly ("Ooh, doesn't Rex look cute! ''), dog outfits as a nation, perhaps at least one major bank would not have required a bailout.

It's a pretty good bet that for every ten people you know, at least four are wearing jeans right now.