Forgotten: A Step-Mother's Loss During and After a Custody Battle
Is Blood Thicker Than Water?
This poem is my first deliberate word on a tragedy that has been personally shelved for nearly five years. The subject, once deemed my daughter, as well as myself were part of a nine-year on-and-off-again custody battle, complicated with abuse, abandonment and a lawyer who decided to become a mother.
I decided to share this unpolished work in my journey to reclaim poetry as a practiced art, reach out to other (step-) parents who may share a similar need for understanding, and for other more and less glorious motives.
Two mothers: one blood, one love
Battle of wits ensue.
Pride razors the daggers,
Who will bleed out first?
Child knows love, not blood,
Yet with age she despairs.
Couture gifts fill the void,
Bedtime melodies long forgotten.
Blood forgiven for absence,
Love resented for weariness.
Child plays the game,
Law enforces affections.
Two mothers: one rich, one beat
Justice folds to vengeance.
Scars never forget
Who loved the child.
Dedicated to Mackenzie
Published by Donna Porter
Writer / Journalist -- A Yahoo News! Contributor Donna began her writing and internet career in 1995 in the health industry and became an early dot-com entrepreneur soon after. Masters certified in Internet... View profile
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103 Comments
Post a CommentYou sound like a self obsessed egomaniac who lost her favourite toy.
You are not the mother you never where or going to be, you simply tried to steal someone else's child and that child's happiness to appease your own childless state. you deserve nothing but scorn for the harm and loss you caused to the REAL mother and child.
It is most difficult to be involved in a custody battle as a step mother. Being supportive of my husband and wanting what is best for the child is my only goal. My goal certainly is not to replace the child's mother, but only to be another positive influence in the child's life. Unfortunately, being the "outsider" has meant projection of the anger, self loathing, and insecurity of the real mother onto me. I tell myself that the level of hate and insecurities that have been exhibited by her should be taken as some sort of flattery, but that is so difficult to remember in the thick of this ugly situation. I just can't wait for it to end.
im going thru a custody battle my dad is trying to take me away from a perfectly good home hes never really been there and this fits me perfectly and my step mom is trying to take the place of my mom and that will NEVER happen and bc of all this i have done some stuff to my body like cut my wrist and everything else that i can never take back and im sorry for every kid that has to go thru this cuz its hard and i dont want anybody to go thru it!
So moving it brought tears, I am going through a custody battle and the father, of my 6 month old gorgeous girl, is refusing to let me see her... It's been the most gut wrenching time of my life and I am so sad and lonely. I pray no other woman takes her like that. I would never do that to a child that wasn't mine. My daughter is worth more than the moon and the stars and I haven't the money for her.
I agree with the poster below. My dad spent tens of thousands fighting for custody of me when I was a little girl. He won because he had more money and he wore my real mother down.I had a loving mother but my new step mother was infertile and was obsessed with getting custody of me. They ran off my real mother and my step mom took her place.She stole my real mother's motherhood.I always had a hole in my heart for my real mother so when I was a teenager I sought her out.When I found her I said I forgive you and it wasn't your fault my dad drove you away. I love my mother dearly and no woman no matter how hard she tried could ever take her place. My step mother is bitter but I never needed nor wanted a new mother.She just wasted her time, she should have adopted a baby that didn't have a mother. I used to have some feelings for my step mother but after I gave birth to my son I find her utterly repulsive. I can only imagine how horrible my mother felt about losing her child! I would just
You were never the mother, you were the father's new partner, you chose to forget this fundamental fact and put yourself and the real mother through a miserable time.
I enjoyed reading this through several times. 'Twas a beautiful poem, spare and powerful.
This is a powerful piece. Good work!
Touching. I, too, hope writing and sharing this helps you some.
I hope that writing the poem helped bring some healing to you. Thanks for sharing. It is heartbreakingly beautiful.