Freedom from Debt

Just like many college students, Jenni Reed of Ashland was bombarded with "pre-approved" credit cards, before she began school last year. "It was exciting. I got a Visa and a Master card and then a few store cards too. My limits didn't seem all that high, so I didn't really think about what it was adding up to, I just knew that I was still "under the limit" on each card, so I kept using them. I remember buying things that I didn't really need, like clothes that I haven't even worn much, books and CD's and things like that. It was fun at the time. Buying things made me feel better."

Euphoria ended fairly quickly when reality started arriving in the mailbox in the form of bills from those credit card companies. She discovered she was overextended and had a hard time making minimum payments. "I realized I could have lived without most of the "stuff" I chose and I have sure paid for it since then in interest and late fees."

Looking back she sees that this caused a great deal of stress. "The bills would come and I wouldn't even want to open them at first. I just stacked them up. And I felt bad about that-- I knew it was wrong to do that. It was just overwhelming. I knew I didn't have enough money to keep up with them. I knew I was in a bind, but I wasn't sure how to fix it."

Her phone started ringing more frequently. "I was getting phone calls from bill collectors. It got to a point where I was scared to answer my phone. I was using my answering machine to screen callers. I was avoiding calling them back. I wasn't sure what I was going to say to them. I'm a full time student with a part time job and I didn't want to drop out of school, but I did want to get my life back in order."

Jenni learned that with credit, you get one chance and it's crucial to make smart decisions from the beginning. It isn't impossible to get out of debt, but it is hard to fix credit problems once you have established a pattern of bad behavior.

Sharon Durling, a personal finance speaker and author of the book, A Girl and Her Money: How to Have a Great Relationship Without Falling in Love, maintains that overspending is not about money or about the things that money can buy, but is indicative of our own emotional voids. Knowing that many women are emotional spenders, she believes, "Money issues are symptomatic of underlying unresolved issues such as disrespect, fear, abandonment issues, self-loathing and communication styles." She understands that women often think that money will make them feel better, safer, stronger and if only we had more of it, we would be happier. The truth is that money won't do any of that. Until we are able to get our emotional needs met through our personal relationships, money will continue to be an obstacle.

Understanding the connection between emotional spending and overspending is a good first step to repairing your credit. Changing the way you use credit can be a daily struggle, but there is help. "I found a credit counseling service and they helped me deal with my creditors," Jenni said. "I still have a way to go, but I know I am making better decisions now and I can see my debts decreasing, so there is a light at the end of the tunnel."