Frequently Asked Questions Submitted by People Cruising for the First Time

I have seen my share of tourists that have taken the proverbial plunge into the cruising world of vacations. With technological advancements, what they are today, combined with the immense size of cruise ships now adays, complete with skating rinks, rock climbing walls, shopping malls, miniature golf courses, movie theaters, basketball courts and multiple whirlpools and spas to balance out the high caloric content provided by the rich, decadent, flavorful, exotic and ethnic meals provided twenty four hours a day while on board. Ice cream, pizza and the diverse array of colorful desserts represent an additional food group in the food pyramid, allowing for and providing the most servings over the course of a day while on board a cruise ship. With the influx of first time cruisers becoming more and more prevalent over the past few years, there have been many, frequently asked questions that I feel need to be addressed to set future cruise vacationers minds at ease better enabling them to enjoy their first cruise.

Below is a list of the top ten questions provided by past guests experiencing a cruise vacation, to the Caribbean, for the first time.

#1) Is the water used in the toilets, fresh water or salt?
This is probably the only question where the answer hasn't become readily available as of this point in time, however, if someone was willing to check and let us know, we could then omit this question from future cruise directories.

#2)The pool and hot tub water is salt water. Where do they get the salt from to make the water salty?
Excellent question! Well as guests will eventually see, the cruise ship travels on the vast oceans and seas. These huge water masses contain a high salinity content and it is water from these oceans and seas that is pumped up to fill the hot tubs and pools.

#3)Are all the Caribbean islands surrounded by water?
I'd be lying if I said none of them were. An island is a parcel of land surrounded by water on all sides and are usually created by volcanic activity or as a result of a coral reef that has become nothing more than a limestone skeleton representing what was once a living and thriving ecosystem.

#4)Are all the meals on board, made and prepared on the ship?
Do you really think Pizza Hut delivers to the ship or the cruise ship has the food catered? I don't think so!

#5)Do the workers live on the ship?
I highly doubt that the cruise director, stateroom attendants and Maitre d among others commute to work via motor boat, kayak or row boat. Of course they do!

#6)When the ship pulls in to port, does everyone have to embark from the ship?
No! I don't think the crew is going to have you arrested for remaining on board while the ship is docked in port.

#7)If I get lost, will there be someone there to help me find my way?
Yes, everyone gets their own personal GPS tracking device to attach to their mixed drink, bucket of quarters in the casino or bathing suit. So getting lost is out of the question, besides their are signs and many staff members on board.

#8)What happens if the Captain falls asleep behind the wheel while we are moving?
The ship then goes off course and ends up in Cuba, Laos or Long Island, or hits a couple buoys which eventually should wake him up. The Captain has pilots to help him while he gets his back messaged, golfs 18 holes, plays XBox, has a 12 course meal an takes a nine hour nap... anyway.

#9)If I don't like the cruise experience, can the ship take me back home before the end of the cruise?
Well, the ship can't because their are thousands of other tourists such as yourself on board, however, you can surely jump over the side and swim back, or call the Coast Guard and have them send out a boat. It may even be worth your while to wait till you get to one of the islands on your itinerary and ask a local to give you a ride home, similar to a taxi, he may be nice and willing to do so.

#10)How many times has this particular ship sank?
Do I really need to answer this question? I mean come on...

So there you have it. A list of some of the most popular and pertinent questions that many avid first time cruisers have instilled in their brains prior to setting sail or shortly thereafter...

Hopefully I have taken the guess work out of the equation and by answering your very important questions, you now should be able to focus your attention to other more pertinent issues like where the closest bathrooms are, where the bars are located, how much a margarita costs, what time dinner is and when do I have to be back on board the ship before the ship leaves without me and I need to find an alternate means of getting home.

Happy Sailing...Bon Voyage...Down the Hatch...Chow