Friend Equality - Can Two People Really Feel the Same About Each Other?

The other day my sister mentioned something about how her boyfriend looks up to another boy in their grade -- they are friends, but John* puts Max* up on a sort of pedestal. Max is way higher on John's MySpace Top Friends list than John is on Max's, which led my mom to chuckle and say that in every friendship or relationship, there is always one person putting more into the relationship, one of the two might value the other just a little more.

I guess this fact had always been apparent but I'd never really thought about it. It's obvious in social cliques where outsiders are always tagging along, hoping to be included, perhaps desperately wishing to be friends with the girl deemed as the most popular. But what about other, more mature friendships? Can both people in any relationship truly feel the same amount towards each other? Do they really need each other equally?

Maybe the only equal ground is when two people are in love with each other. Love is love, right? Or maybe the types of love are a little different. No one can know for sure. Thinking of all my friends and acquaintances right now, I'm wondering how much they truly value me... do I really mean that much to them? As I think of them, I of course like them all but for different reasons. Maybe I'd miss one more over another. I'd feel too analytical looking at my cell phone's call log, seeing who's picked the phone up to call the other more often, but then again that's not much of a determining factor.

Then I wonder if I've changed my friends' lives at all. Would they be the same without me? I'm curious as to whether I'm just another person to call, chat with or hang out with. I won't talk about the people who are called or the people who call me only when there is no one else left and all other contacts are busy or have betrayed them--that is another story. Or if with any of them, there's something deeper. I do have people I call to hang out with, I have people that provide me amusement, people that maybe I'm not close with but I find something about them inspiring. But then there are the friends who I've had so many experiences with that I can't imagine how my life would be different had I not known them.

I guess all we can do is continue to be good people to one another, and if you love someone or they mean something to you, let them know.

*names have been changed