Friendship the Basis of the Real Love Story

I just wanted to feel special again. I was so tired of the road, so tired of the unreturned phone calls and cancellations. Even if I never spoke to anyone except the bartender, I always felt appreciated when I sang.

He came in shortly after I did and I think he asked me to help him find a song to sing. The conversation was casual, a brief word here and there. He had a great voice and he reminded me of a cross between Kenny Rogers and Ernest Hemingway. As the night went on, we talked more and danced. The KJ - who we had both known separately for years - ended the evening by officially pronouncing Harry and I "friends".

Perhaps it helped that we both worked strange hours. I was traveling all over the country, he worked every other weekend. When our schedules meshed, sometimes after not seeing each other for two weeks, we would meet for a drink and spend hours talking. Sometimes the bartender would be completely finished with her side work and we would realize we were all alone, most of the lights turned out. Then, he would walk me to my car and give me a good night kiss that curled my toes.

There were so many reasons it shouldn't have worked. I was a free-spirited, fiercely independent liberal who could not accept anything less than a full partner. He had spent 35 years of his life serving our country. I was four years old when he graduated high school and soon volunteered for the Air Force and went to Vietnam.

I think the reason it did work is that Harry did something for me that no other man had ever done in my 40 years. He courted me. It sounds so old fashioned but every time we were together, he made me feel special. I fought my feelings - I was not going to jump into anything, especially when the odds seemed so stacked against a true long-term relationship.

And I will never forget the night at Hoggy's in Gahanna when Harry looked at me with tears in his eyes and told me he was falling in love with me.

He doesn't even know how romantic he is. I don't think he really understands how much I melt when he wins a stuffed animal for me out of one of those claw machines. It's just a simple gesture. Yes, I know it's partly his competitiveness of beating the machine but he could just as easily hand the toy to a child. But he brings it to me and it might as well be the Hope Diamond.

Washing my hair, rubbing my back, grabbing me to dance in the kitchen while we're cooking - these are gifts I never had in my life. However, the most important gift Harry has given me is friendship. He is my best friend, my lover, my 100 percent partner in everything that I try or do.

The most important lesson I think we've taught each other is to not wait for a specific day when the rest of the world says "celebrate your love". We celebrate our life together every single day and each day that we are given is one more to create a memory in honor of our love.