From VIP to VIP

The Paris Hilton predicament escalated to parade status yesterday morning. Following public furor, over her recent release and VIP special treatment, Judge Sauer ordered the socialite to testify in person, rather than over the phone as was originally planned. A throng of paparazzi and other rubber-neckers positioned themselves outside the Hilton home to lay in wait. When Paris appeared, the crowd heaved forward like a school of piranha. An MSNBC reporter on the scene caught the brunt of it. Smack in the middle of the frenzy, he tried to quell the horde to no avail. The poor man ought to receive hazardous duty pay. County and city officers couldn't even control the crowd. It was a media spectacle to rival the Jackson and Simpson trials.

Miss Hilton violated the terms of her 36 month probation following an arrest for driving under the influence in September of 2006. When she was pulled over in February of this year, driving 70 mph in a 35 mph zone on a suspended license, it led to a sentence of 45 days hard time. Due to an alleged, medical condition Paris left the LA County Jail with a bracelet and a smile. After serving less than five days she returned to her 2700 square foot home to complete the rest of her sentence. She issued a canned statement to the press about how much she learned from the ordeal and how she hoped others learned from it as well. So far as I can tell, the only thing to be learned from it is that if you have enough cold hard cash, you can try to walk away from cold hard time.

However, it seems that this case excepted that rule. Judge Sauer's initial ruling was ignored. The aggravation of the general public brought attention to this blatant disregard of the law. When it was all said and done, the good judge determined that the heiress is to be remanded to the custody of the officials again. She was taken back to the Twin Towers Detention Facility despite throwing a Nanny 911 tantrum all the way. Miss Hilton burst into hysterics and screamed "It's not fair!" She was sobbing and shaking as she was escorted out of the courtroom by both arms. She looked over her shoulder on the way out like a spoiled, petulant child looking for their "MOM!!!!!!!!!"

Miss Hilton proved time and again that she needn't be handled with kid gloves....maybe rubber gloves but not kid gloves. 1 Night in Paris showed that she can certainly handle hard time. Her refusal to acknowledge that, she too is subject to state and federal laws indicates that she has the right mindset for a stint in the slammer. Judge Sauer is a voice of the people and understands the gravity of his position as such. His decision to be heard, despite all the posh and privilege, was sound and just. Paris may end up benefiting from this experience. The Fox Network could make it into a reality show - VIP: Very Incarcerated Paris. Hopefully not, but with Fox anything is possible.

A little humility never killed anyone. Paris should know that better than anyone after the roasting she recently took from Sarah Silverman at the MTV Movie Awards. Jail time is sure to be more humbling than Miss Hilton's vain and condescending attempt at The Simple Life. However, all in all, the greatest benefit in this case was to the lagging American justice system. Judge Sauer should be commended for insuring that sometimes there really is "...liberty and justice for all." Now we just have to wait and see how long it lasts.