From Warrior to Wimp: Day Two

That's what I have to say. Ouch.

My arms are incredibly sore right now. I may have overdone it on my first day at the gym. Too much enthusiasm, I guess.

After typing up my tirade about how am I transforming myself from a wimp to a warrior, I went to my local gym. As soon as I stepped foot into that sweaty arena, I embarrassed myself. All of the men athletic men and women (who all physically put me to shame) were dressed in sweats or shorts or spandex. Basically, everyone wore appropriate workout attire. Everyone except me that is. I was wearing a nice T-shirt and a khaki pair of Dockers slacks. My loafers didn't seem to fit in too well either. Oh well, I wasn't going to let a costuming issue stop me from pumping iron!

First stop: The Treadmill.

My manly friend Joel had previously explained that I should run a little bit. I went directly to the treadmill. I stood at the machine, staring at a variety of blinking lights, digital numbers and plastic buttons. I wasn't sure what to do, so I just pressed "Quick Start." A second later, I found myself lying face down on the ground. After recovering from my pratfall, and assuring the concerned woman next to me that "I meant to do that," I returned to the treadmill.

I must have hit the right button because the conveyor belt began to move slowly. Once I started walking, I adjusted the speed until I found myself running at a brisk six miles an hour. I was exhausted after four minutes.

I decided to simmer down by the water cooler. I drank about five cups of H20. In the back of my mind, I heard the distant voices of various middle school P.E. teachers: "Don't drink too much water! It's not good for you!" I crumpled my paper cup in manly defiance and then I went to...

Second Stop: Taking on the Machines

Let me just say, the machines won.

My first weightlifting device was something called a "curler." I know, it sounds like a girly product for hair sculpting, but its actually a machine that exercises the biceps. I adjusted the weight to 40 pounds. I found it surprisingly easy to lift.

So, I changed the weight all the way up to 70 pounds and began to curl. The first two curls were easy. But the third one! Man, it was as though all of my strength reserves had been used up! I barely pulled the third curl. Then, after panting for a few moments, I lowered the weight to 60 pounds.

My macho friend Joel had advised me of this: "Do sets of 3 - 6 - 3. Three at a high weight, six at a lower intensity, and three back to the heightened level. He explained, "The first three curls should be difficult for you. Then, the set of six won't seem so bad."

However, as I approached my fourth curl, I was struggling to lift those weights. I actually found myself involuntarily grunting. Great, I thought, now I'm embarrassing myself in front of the soccer moms.

After my set of six, it was time to raise the weight back up to 70 pounds. I could barely make the final curl. Afterwards, I rested, drank more water, and managed to slowly work my way through four other machines before becoming completely exhausted. I didn't quit until this horrible feeling of nausea swept over me. Then, I was finally done. Sadly, the whole work out lasted only about 15 minutes. Everyone else in the gym was still working away, pumping iron, feeling the burn.

Man, am I a wimp! Well, that's going to change! I realize that today was tough, but it wasn't my biggest challenge. That will come tomorrow, when we find out if I actually return to the gym!