Funny, Exciting Fiction You Can Take a Relaxing Break With

Fred Jones was standing on the sidewalk waiting for a bus. He saw an airplane over head, looked up, and when he looked back down, there was an odd-looking dude pulling on his lapel.

"Hey," he said. "Lay off my lapel."

"Don't worry," said the odd-looking dude. "I was just checking to see if you could get a Cloissone pin on there."

"A what?"

"A cloissone pin."

"What in the world is that?"

"It's a kind of pin."

"You say it with such a like, flourish."

"I know, well, that's, it's just how I speak. It's neither here nor there. And there isn't much time."

Fred blinked.

"I need your help. I need you to put this pin on your lapel and then get yourself to the Central Playground in Madison."

"Uhh ... Wisconsin, right?" said Fred.

"Yes, exactly. Have you been there?"

"No, never."

"Where are you from?"

Fred furrowed his brow a little. "California?" he asked skeptically. "I've lived here all my life."

"Okay," said the dude. "Well look, what types of commitments do you have for the next week or so? You're a good candidate, but we can use Lewis Carnelian if absolutely necessary."

Fred took a thing out of his pocket. It was a day planner. Fred was neither a Luddite nor an early adopter. He liked electronic gadgetry as much as the next guy, but his fancy smartphone had been in the shop so he had brought his fake-leather-covered, spiral day planner. He thumbed through it.

"I got nothin," he said finally.

"No job?"

"I have - it's too complicated to explain. I do need money," he said.

"Well okay then," said the dude. Fred noticed he was wearing a paisley bandana. Up until now, it had been covered by his collar. "There will be money to be had."

Fred made some gestures in air with his pointer. "That sounded a bit ... conditional."

"Don't worry," said the dude. "You're perfect. Just the kind of free agent we wanted. Will you accept?"

"Just go to Madison with a pin?"

"That's right."

"I need to fly there on a plane or something."

"Your expenses will be paid."

Fred blinked again. "It doesn't sound difficult. What about ethics? Anything I should know?"

"See," said the dude, "this is why we like you. I didn't even have to prompt you to ask about ethics. That's pretty rare today."

Fred got a steely-eyed look. "You haven't answered my question."

The dude clapped his hands!

"Love it!" he said.

"You haven't answered my question," repeated Fred.

"You're our star," said the dude. "I KNEW you were the right choice."

"Why does it seem like the more I insist, the more you hedge?"

"I got you," the dude said seriously. "You have my word there is no ethical issue with this delivery."

Fred looked concerned.

"Well, okay," he said. The dude instantly reached into his pocket and pulled out what looked like a small, white jewelry box. He lifted the lid. There was a small Cloissone pin inside with a cryptic insignia looking like a funky arrow that bent around on itself.

"Go on," said the dude. "Put it on."

"Errrr," said Fred. "Well, all right." Fred took the Cloissone pin and stuck it to his lapel.

"There's only one catch," said the dude.

"Pfft," Fred said. "NOW you tell me!"

"It's an aspect generator. Every hour, the pin will fire, and you will be joined by a ... something. It could be a person, place, thing or idea. It will be there, right with you."

Fred looked confused.

"Well, we're coming up on the hour right now so I can demonstrate for you. Just hold on for about a minute and a half."

Fred had a look of consternation on his face but he sat tight for ninety seconds.

"And three," said the dude. "two, one."

George Francis Train popped into existence on the sidewalk and he looked none too pleased!