Funny Quips from Fringe's Dr. Walter Bishop

Dr. Walter Bishop, played by the talented John Noble, is a somewhat unorthodox scientist on Fox's hit sci-fi show Fringe. He is a strange man who comes up with some very unusual and often funny quips.

Other Fringe cast members include Joshua Jackson as Walter's son Peter; Lance Reddick as Agent Phillip Broyles head of Fringe division; Blair Brown as Nina Sharp, head of Massive Dynamics; Astrid Farnsworth played by Jasika Nicole, an FBI agent who assists (and "babysits") Dr. Bishop in his lab; and Anna Torva as Special Agent Olivia Dunham.

Now that you've met the cast, read on for some of my favorite lines from the second half of season 3 of Fringe spoken by Dr. Walter Bishop.

Fringe Episode 56 "Entrada" (S3/E8 aired 12/02/10)

The Fringe team learns how to communicate between worlds in "Entrada."

The Faux Olivia has been exposed. She is on the run, probably trying to figure out how to get back to her world. The Fringe team is looking to Walter to see if he has any ideas on how to bring their Olivia back to their world and how the fake Olivia might be going back.

Agent Phillip Broyles: Dr. Bishop, any thoughts on how she (the fake Olivia) will cross to the other side?

Walter: Nope. Nothing. And I have no idea how to bring our Olivia back. It's all because of that temptress. She tricked my son with her carnal manipulations and he fell right into her vagenda.

Fringe Episode 58 "The Firefly" (S3/E10 aired 1/21/11)

In "The Firefly" Walter finds he's in tune with his musical hero, played by Christopher Lloyd.

Peter comes downstairs at 2am to find Walter holding a needle in his mouth while dropping his pants (revealing his cute guitar-printed boxers) about to inject himself with something.

Peter: Walter?

Walter: Peter. You're up early.

Peter: Oh, no, I'm still asleep upstairs in my bed. You're just talking to an astral projection of me.

Walter: You're just saying that to see if I'm high.

Peter: What are you doing, Walter?

Walter: I'm making myself smarter.

Fringe Episode 59 "Reciprocity" (S3/E11 aired 1/28/11)

Two incidents trigger one massive investigation in "Reciprocity."

Walter wants to make himself smarter so he can help his son Peter by trying to re-grow the parts of his brain that have been removed. Nina at Massive Dynamics has found some of Dr. Bell's old research but the labels have been damaged so they have no idea what the serums contain - whether they are from Walter or from lab animals.

Nina (talking to Dr. Bishop): You were right. I found William's research. His notes suggest that he designed a retro-viral serum based on your DNA that will re-grow your brain tissue.

Walter: That's wonderful. Thank you, Belly.

Nina: Walter, William experimented with lab animals first, a rat and a chimpanzee. Now, back in the 90s we had a small lab fire. The original labels were destroyed. I am going to ask the lab to run diagnostics on all 3 then they should be able to tell us which one was made for you.

(Walter takes a snort of the serum not knowing which DNA it contains)

Nina: Walter!

Walter: Don't worry. I've snorted worse. A few good whiffs and my brain should be able to begin to grow its missing parts.

Nina: And what if the serum is not based on your DNA?

Walter: I'll probably get a rash.

Later on, Walter and Astrid are examining the body of a shape shifter. Walter does a kind of strange sounding yawn.

Walter: Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh

Astrid: Walter?

Walter: I'm sorry. That was very rude. (Pause) I was displaying dominance.

Astrid: Excuse me?

Walter: The serum I took. It must have been meant for a chimpanzee.

Astrid: You mean it's growing chimp DNA in your brain?

Fringe Episode 60 "Concentrate and Ask Again" (S3/E12 aired 2/04/11)

Two incidents trigger one massive investigation in "Concentrate and Ask Again."

A man receives a unique birthday gift; a doll who, when the string is pulled on her back, explodes spraying a white powder in the man's face. The man then shrivels up and dies instantly with all the bones in his body disappearing. The Fringe team goes to investigate. They are wearing full chemical/biological suits as they are approaching the body.

Walter (kneeling by the body): Oh my, look at this. I feel nauseated.

Peter: Yep. This is pretty disgusting, even by our standards.

Walter: I'm not talking about the body. I feel I may have broken wind inside my suit.

Fringe Episode 62 "6B" (S3/E14 aired 2/18/11)

People have seemingly fallen through the solid floor of a balcony to their deaths at the old Rosencrantz Hotel. Walter flips a coin 10 times and ten times it lands on heads. This leads Walter to the conclusional theory that there is a rift beginning between the two Earths and the vortex is beginning right there in the hotel. Later, Peter and Olivia are led back to the hotel when a disturbance occurs. The disturbance appears to be coming from apartment 6B. When they can get no response from inside, Peter busts the door down and they find an elderly lady sitting in the room of blinking lights. Olivia can see what appears to be an apparition of the widowed lady's dead husband. Peter cannot.

Walter comes to the apartment with some radiation detecting equipment.

Walter: Nothing. I thought there'd be some radiation leakage from over there. (Meaning the parallel universe).

Peter: So you're not buying that it's her husband's ghost?

Walter: There's no such thing as ghosts.

Peter: That's where you draw the line? Ghosts?

Walter: Belly and I used to argue about this constantly '" what happens to the body's energy after death. William (Bell) theorized we should be able to capture that energy using what he called Soul Magnets.

Peter: It's a catchy name.

Walter: He said if he were right, he'd contact me from the great beyond. I haven't gotten the call yet.

Fringe Episode 64 "Os" (S3/E16 aired 3/11/11)

Walter is in the security room at Massive Dynamics watching the security monitors with a guard. Walter appears to be smoking a substance using a bong. He's telling a story to the guard.

Walter: I didn't realize until later. I woke up and there she was in my bed. Yoko.

Guard: What did he say?

Walter: It was the 70s. What could he say?

Fringe Episode 65 "Stowaway" (S3/E17 aired 3/18/11)

Walter's scientific partner, now deceased, Dr. William Bell (Belly) figured out a way for his theory concerning Soul Magnets to become reality and Walter discovered the item that needed to be used to bring his friend Belly' soul back to life. Belly now occupies space in Agent Olivia Dunham's brain. The real Olivia is still inside in a state of rest. Belly wants the Fringe team to help him find a more suitable home for his consciousness.

Belly is reviewing some research papers while Walter is yet again smoking a suspicious substance. Let's call it medicinal marijuana. They are discussing how to find a suitable host for Belly. Gene the cow moos. (Gene lives in Walter's lab to provide fresh milk for him.) Belly gives Gene a look of interest. Walter, reading Belly's mind, tells him "No!" Belly and Walter go over and begin to brush Gene while continuing their discussion.

Walter: Even if we were able to transfer your consciousness safely inside Gene, there are other matters to consider.

William/Olivia: We would communicate through my brain waves. You would hook me up to a EEG machine and decipher
my thought.

Walter: Hmm -- it may work -- but still -- I'd have to milk you.

Fringe Episode 67 "Lysergic Acid Diethylamide" (S3/E19 aired 4/15/11)

Walter has decided in order to separate Olivia's consciousness from William's they have to enter her mind to extract her using LSD as a portal into her mind.

Walter to Peter: This may be a weird time to ask, but, have you ever dreamt?

Peter: Are you suggesting that -- .

Walter: Of course! It's Olivia's mind we're entering. Presumably it will be some maze-like integration of a psychical memory of subconscious. You know her better than anyone. If she is lost in her mind then we need you to guide us.
Astrid! We need to accept 2000 milligrams of LSD and we need some sugar cubes, please.

The sugar cubes are prepared with the LSD. Walter hands one to Peter.

Walter: Don't be nervous. I imagine there are things in this very lab that are as mind blowing as anything I've experienced while tripping.

Fringe Episode 68 "6:02 AM EST" (S3/E20 aired 4/22/11)

Olivia has finally spent the night with Peter. She wakes up early, leaves Peter sleeping in bed and heads downstairs where she comes face to face with a naked Walter.

Walter: Good morning, Olivia. I didn't know you were spending the night. What a lovely surprise.

Olivia: Oh, no, the surprise is all mine.

Walter: I'm going to pop another mushroom fratarter into the oven. I got some rails from the market with the biggest caps you've ever seen.

Olivia: Sure.

Walter: Olivia.

Olivia: Mmm hmm?

Walter: You should get some slippers for when you stay over here. This house can get very chilly.

Fringe is a fall/winter TV series which airs Fridays at 9/8c on Fox.

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