Funny Quotes for Dad on Father's Day

Are you sick of looking up Father's Day quotes and running across the same sappy statements over an over? Not sure about you, but some of this mush, I can't imagine penning in a card to my father. (And honestly, so much of it sounds more like a lecture on what dad's should be. How is that even nice?)

Anyway, making my dad smile is a more welcome bet for a happy occasion (especially, since he gave me so many smiles growing up!) Hope these help you sift through the sappy and create fun memories this Father's Day.

Tim Russert, Journalist
"The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get."

Al Unser, Jr., Racecar Driver
"Dad taught me everything I know. Unfortunately, he didn't teach me everything he knows."

Reed Markham, PhD
"Being a great father is like shaving. No matter how good you shaved today, you have to do it again tomorrow."

John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester
"Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories."

Bill Cosby, Comedian
Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.

Jerry Lewis, Comedian
"When I was a kid, I said to my father one afternoon, 'Daddy, will you take me to the zoo?' He answered, 'If the zoo wants you, let them come and get you.'"

Cameron Diaz, Actress
"My dad always used to tell me that if they challenge you to an after-school fight, tell them you won't wait-you can kick their ass right now."

Charles Wadsworth, Musician
"By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong."

Unknown
"A father is a guy who has snapshots in his wallet where his money used to be." - Unknown

Harmon Killebrew, MLB Baseball Player
"My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass"; "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys";"

Red Buttons, Actor, Comedian
"Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. "
Fathers Day Quote by: Red Buttons

Robert Frost, Writer
"The father is always a Republican toward his son, and his mother's always a Democrat.

Resources:
http://www.chiff.com/a/fathers-day-quotes.htm•
http://thinkexist.com/quotations/fathers/2.html
http://www.fathersdaycelebration.com/inspirational-quotes.html
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/father.html
http://hubpages.com/hub/Quotes-about-Fathers